Ben Marvin - FriendFeed

Joke is on all of you guys for fabbing a tweet with a typo.

18 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Jiggling the cables at the train yard switching station. Just to see what will happen. Lulz, I think a fusebox is about to blow.

20 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@annoyatron Just an installation job we're doing down there. Don't think they're planning on moving.

21 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@NFS2912 That was my 30,000th tweet. WELCOME TO TWITTER!

21 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@beccaomgz They want you to fuck his dead body. That like totally isn't drowning.

21 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

There's been word that I may have to go to Mississippi for work. I think instead of laying me off they want me to get killed by rednecks.

21 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I'm so hardcore, I shave my balls with a cicular saw. Blindfolded. Drunk. IN SPACE!

20 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@jillianmadsen Where you asleep in history class like all the time? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki...

22 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I guess that's what I get for not paying my phone bill. I have no idea what any of you are talking about.

22 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I guess you're all glassy-eyed validation junkies since none of you has said anything fucking funny since Favrd disappeared.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@DieLaughing Oh yeah, I forgot. Where's all the Australians?

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Shit, did I just accidentally retweet something?

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

@DieLaughing That's what @kinda_gay has been doing like all day. I heard he's not putting his arms down till Favrd comes back.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I didn't know they still made JNCO jeans. Let alone made them for 4 foot tall Mexicans.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

After booty texting all the girls in my phone book I realize that none of my female friends will fuck me without my girlfriend joining in.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

How to dance to a Jason Mraz song: Swing your arms around in a lazy manner like you're attempting to knock over every beer in the world.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I think I spilled some raftjuice on my shirt.

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

What the hell is Favrd?

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Fat girls always have big boobs. What's saggin with that?

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I think the only thing that will stop this girl from singing a Christmas song is my dick in her mouth. Brb.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Where can I get government funding to test the theory that you can't get a girl pregnant by fucking her in the ass?

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

If I ever develop a gambling problem, I can always find number to the addiction hotline on the back of these 100's of losing lotto tickets.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I about to leave a comment on your blog. Up in here. Up in here. I might even send you a strongly worded email. Up in here. Up in here.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

About to drink a tall glass of validation and get all glassy eyed.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

NORF CAROLINA! TROW YO HANDS UP! TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF! SWING IT ROUND YOU HEAD LIKE A GLITTERCOPTER! SHOW YO TITTAYS!

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Note to self: Get motor oil, duct tape, ski mask and a dozen D batteries for next weekend with girlfriend.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

"Buying a harmonica in North Carolina"

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Ruining my own personal brand by talking to a hyperlocal blog about pineapples and ninjatacoing. Loljk, I'm just looking at her cleavage.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I sure could go for an aspirin, egg and cheese sandwich right about now.

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Is that a tennis bracelet tattoo on your wrist? That's like a zillion times gayer than a tribal armband.

Friday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share