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Bill Barol
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About 4 posts per day
"Wait. Who? I-- Shit. I thought that was Maya Angelou."
http://www.cbsnews.com/blogs...
10 hours ago
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"Wait. You're gonna do what? No, I'm sorry, I was mistaken before. He's definitely Spartacus. That guy. Not me. Him."
#1stdraftmovielines
11 hours ago
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"The stuff that dreams are made of. Oh, wait, no: it's a statue of a bird. I think. I'm pretty drunk."
#1stdraftmovielines
11 hours ago
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"Major Strasser has been shot. Round up the usual suspects. {Points at Rick and stage-whispers} But this guy did it."
#1stdraftmovielines
11 hours ago
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"You're going to need a bigger boat, or possibly an armored hovercraft of some kind."
#1stdraftmovielines
11 hours ago
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LA pot factory on fire: You know how people say "These jokes aren't gonna write themselves"? Sometimes they do.
http://abclocal.go.com/kabc...
13 hours ago
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MSNBC grave-rob coverage: There's no story of human tragedy that isn't made vastly sadder by a hard cut to the freecreditreport.com guys.
14 hours ago
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Pelosi shows political courage, says... Wait. What is she saying, now?
http://news.yahoo.com/s...
15 hours ago
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Jackson-Lee: MJ an "icon" and a "legend." Throw in "visionary" for the trifecta, lady. You're just doggin' it otherwise.
Tuesday
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Something I did not previously know: According to Al Sharpton, Michael Jackson "taught the world how to love." So he had that going for him.
Tuesday
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I'm so pleased Flavor Flav asked me to pass along this beautiful poem today. It's called "Shit Is About To Get Ill All Up In Here."
Tuesday
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I'm so pleased Flava Flav asked me to pass along this beautiful poem today. It's called "Shit Is About To Get Ill All Up In Here."
Tuesday
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This just in from Touré: Overused hack pseudo-intellectual media commentator cliché of the day is NARRATIVE. That's "NARRATIVE." Pass it on.
Tuesday
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Oh jesus fucking christ.
#mjmemorialcoveragejustfuckingshootmenow
Tuesday
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MSNBC: Let's see... Gloria Allred, Al Sharpton... I only need Jesse Jackson for Mic-Chaser Bingo.
Tuesday
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MSNBC: The Jackson funeral is a big enough event to render Eugene Robinson and Touré functionally equivalent. Heck of a job there, Jacko.
Tuesday
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MSNBC reporting immediate family to take solid-gold jetpacks from Forest Lawn to Staples, and will buzz Liz Taylor's house on the way.
Tuesday
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Private funeral procession for grief-stricken family? Check. Live satellite feed from inside same? Double-check.
Tuesday
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"Apple Mail To Do" folder? Gone. I killed it. It's dead. Because I am what? Yes: "Just that awesome."
Monday
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I admire the craft and ingenuity of Jacques Tati movies. What I'm realizing is, this isn't the same thing as finding them funny.
#TCM
Sunday
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"Well, of COURSE I was stalking her. I was HIGH."
http://news.yahoo.com/s...
Sunday
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I don't want to say I'm out of shape, but I did have to nap twice during the Roddick-Federer final.
Sunday
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Oh my God: It's the first draft of Palin's resignation speech! Seriously! It is!
http://trueslant.com/billbar...
July 4
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I miss Palin already. So I'm going to drink nine Scotches, squint hard and go talk to a schizoid. It'll be close. But it won't be the same.
July 4
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Palin: Was she reading, or speaking extemporaneously? Because she really shouldn't do either.
July 3
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Palin: Role of a good point guard is to pass the ball, head for the locker room and leave the other four guys to finish the game.
July 3
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@
ashmont
They're talking about beatifying Cardinal Krol of Philadelphia, but I'm pretty sure it's because he found some guy's keys.
July 3
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Palin's talk about "enemies" makes me think of Nixon, but of course Nixon was a lot more huggable.
July 3
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MSNBC to re-air entire Palin speech at 5:30 ET. Which gives me seven minutes to get into my Snuggie and microwave some JiffyPop.
July 3
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Palin solidifies status with base and others, because if there's one thing Americans love it's people who quit because a job's kinda hard.
July 3
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