If you hypothetically don't know too many nursery rhymes 80's songs work in a pinch. Just replace a few words with baby terms. This mornings example: Safety Dance - replace "dance" with "poop" or "toot" and it instantly helps soothe the baby.
Dear Amazon. I bought a Heavy Duty Bench Vise from you on Wednesday. I'm pretty sure a good suggestion for me to buy today is not four more Heavy Duty Bench Vises. There are only so many things to clamp.
Conversation between baby and cat who is still terrified of baby: Baby "squawk" Cat "WTF meow" Baby "squawk" Cat "Seriously WTF meow" Baby "longer squawk" Cat "F this I'm out of here meow" and promptly leaves room.