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Damnit Jim.
That awkward moment when you get your shit jumped for nothing. #nigachillout
That awkward moment when you actually know what your stomach is saying to you when it's growling. #tummywhisperer
RT @dannysullivan: OMG there are people who drive carts on a golf course selling alcohol. That's an unexpected surprise
I don't get paid enough for this shit. #fml
Just because I'm behind the table, dooooesn't make me any less than you. #asshat
RT @Apsconsum: @Caithagar Your in the desert. Dats why. #explanation
Explain to me why I live in the desert and it's freezing ass cold?
"Captain Long Dong and his gay pirates." - @SherylLoch
I want to make a Twitter account called "WhiteVan" and go follow everyone.
Victoria's Secret Show! Just to remind me how beautiful I could have been if I didn't turn out short, pale and klutzy. Damn.
RT @chelsaya: If I'm not at all bothered by my big nose, why are you? It's not your nose. I like my nose, it's Italian. Yours is just a bitch nose.
If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk.
"Steve Jobs didn't connect with his earth father, that's why he died of pancreatic cancer. It was coming to him." Are you legit? Get real.
Holy shit! I'm sick and running around. #lolmylife
Went on a @Zappos tour. That was hella cool. Christina who walked us around was awesome.
Angry Birds is making me want to use Chrome. That pisses me off.
Please give our new music site a Google +1 http://t.co/HruaY72
I just made $779 today check this out http://t.co/7QIIpbg
That frightening moment when you see your step mom online at the same time as you on facebook...
Wendy Williams is by far the scariest monster I've ever seen in my life.
Steve JobLESS must have ran of iDeas.
That awkward moment when a bug flies up your nose and you whack yourself in the face, repeatedly... when people are watching. -_-
Watching #SameName. I wish Sammy Hagar was rich, and my first name was Sammy. Lawlz.
RT @WilliamNV: RT @Vegasgeoff: Congrats to Amy Winehouse on her first week of sobriety.
RT @thisguydoug: If you're reading this tweet, the Internet can truly be used for the most trivial useless crap ever.
Just got my hands burnt from the hot water pipe spontaneously detaching itself from the sink. Lovely.
Watching some Dr. Who 'cause I'm coo'.
I love when we're out at the store and the truck breaks down.......
Thank you! RT @SWBN Just made another video (I'm a machine today)...this time to show @CaitHagar how to configure Pamela https://www.facebook.com/video...
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