Jon Winokur - FriendFeed

How wonderful opera would be if there were no singers. GIOACCHINO ROSSINI #opera #quote

3 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Psychoanalysis: a rabbit that was swallowed by a boa constrictor who just wanted to see what it was like in there. KARL KRAUS

4 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

8 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

There are times when parenthood seems nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you. PETER DE VRIES #children #parenthood

20 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly. VOLTAIRE

23 hours ago from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

The first clergyman was the first rascal who met the first fool. VOLTAIRE

yesterday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

That all men are created equal is a proposition to which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given his assent. ALDOUS HUXLEY

yesterday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Every year, Christmas gets longer and longer. When I was a kid, Halloween was Halloween, and Santa wasn't poking his ass into it!LEWIS BLACK

yesterday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Positive thinking is the most stressful thing you can do. DEEPAK CHOPRA

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

The Swiss are not a people so much as a neat, clean, quite solvent business. WILLIAM FAULKNER

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. GEORGE BERNARD SHAW #quote #quotes #quotation

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year. VICTOR BORGE #santa #Christmas #quote

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

New York: Where everyone mutinies but no one deserts. HARRY HERSHFIELD

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

We would have broken up except for the children. Who were the children? Well, she and I were. MORT SAHL

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

This quote best sums up the decade: "We did it for the show." -- Balloon Boy (via @BorowitzReport)

Tuesday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. FRED ALLEN #law #quote

Monday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

One goes to see a tragedy to be moved; to the opera one goes either for want of any other interest or to facilitate digestion. VOLTAIRE

Monday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Melancholy men, of all others, are the most witty. ARISTOTLE

Monday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

My unhealthy affection for my second daughter has waned. Now I despise all my seven children equally. EVELYN WAUGH #children

Monday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

“Merry Christmas, Nearly Everybody!” OGDEN NASH

Monday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Art is long and life is short: here is evidently the explanation of a Brahms symphony. EDWARD LORNE #quote #quotes #quotation

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Nature, in her indifference, makes no distinction between good and evil. ANATOLE FRANCE #quote #quotes #quotation

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Criticism is prejudice made plausible. H. L. MENCKEN #quote #quotes #quotation

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Oh life is a glorious cycle of song,/ A medley of extemporanea;/ And love is a thing that can never go wrong;/ And (cont) http://www.twitlonger.com/show...

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

And Here's the Kicker: Conversations with 21 Top Humor Writers on their Craft by Mike Sacks #writechat

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

Fidelity n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed. AMBROSE BIERCE #quote #quotes #quotation

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. GEORGE BERNARD SHAW #quote #quotes #quotation

Sunday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

There are times when you have to choose between being human and having good taste. BERTOLT BRECHT

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What is more enchanting than the voices of young people when you can’t hear what they say? LOGAN PEARSALL SMITH #children #quote

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share

The murals in restaurants are on a par with the food in museums. PETER DE VRIES

Saturday from Twitter - Comment - Like - Share