deusdiabolus › Comments

"1. Be happy in life. 2. Leave a large audience completely stunned. 3. I haven't decided what the third thing should be." - deusdiabolus

"Then she was a stupid cunt who secretly likes being offended by people." - deusdiabolus

"Oh snap, dog herpes!" - deusdiabolus

"I was going to watch it, but that guy's voice - fake or natural - is the kind of voice that's usually attached to people who enjoy proving how much more they know than you." - deusdiabolus

"How much tomorrow is going to suck." - deusdiabolus

"How much tomorrow is going to suck." - deusdiabolus

"Even if Daft Punk, The Chemical Brothers, Moby, The Crystal Method, Josh Wink, Tiesto, BT, Sasha, The Bassbin Twins and Fatboy Slim all collaborated on a holiday album, you would STILL have to listen to Mannheim Steamroller. Because Muzak playlists get REALLY stingy at this time of year. Don't want to piss off all the angry protest-organizing folk who get all bent out of shape if you don't say "Merry Christmas" enough." - deusdiabolus

"Your walls were boring For so long Want to remodel, but You're too cheap to do it Some WiFi hacker knows what's going on Knows you installed e-walls...now he's screwed it Aaaaand while you try to block his signal You're just trying not to look Living room is Tay Zonday Kitchenette is Numa guy Diet Coke and Mentos lining the rec room Master suite is dancing Matt Juggernaut is in the back Why did they put Keyboard Cat in the bathroom?" - deusdiabolus

"That would be my preference for sex with older men, probably." - deusdiabolus

"According to at least one source, he died later." - deusdiabolus

"Have you spoken to a doctor about getting anti-depressants?" - deusdiabolus

"Those would both be taxing to organs." - deusdiabolus

"DAMN, you beat me to it." - deusdiabolus

"The latter." - deusdiabolus

"I don't know if this is THE most repulsive, but...[it's close](http://robert-lindsay.blogspot.com/2009...)." - deusdiabolus

"My sense of purpose." - deusdiabolus

"OK, time to log off Reddit because I was expecting the answer to somehow involve bacon." - deusdiabolus

"And he probably doesn't know the word PWN3D." - deusdiabolus

"Chuck Norris fears nothing. Except logic." - deusdiabolus

"I learned about this from [Lewis Black](http://www.youtube.com/watch...)." - deusdiabolus

"Now, YOUR objective is to try and prevent the world from completely obliterating that in her." - deusdiabolus

"Daily." - deusdiabolus

"The second one used to be included with the JAZZ album. BONUS TRIVIA: All the bicycles used for the promotional photo shoot/bicycle race had to have the seats replaced before the rental company would take them back." - deusdiabolus

"[REMIX!](http://www.youtube.com/watch...)" - deusdiabolus

"What if we somehow get Fred Phelps to picket Joe Arpaio?" - deusdiabolus

"What **Gyarados** said. Also, always remember to knock before entering the room with the computer." - deusdiabolus

It probably also bears mentioning that drinking at least two 8 oz. glasses of water per day helps. - deusdiabolus

It probably also bears mentioning that drinking at least two 8 oz. glasses of water per day helps. - deusdiabolus from Amplify

"It would certainly create more of a quandary for the religious devout." - deusdiabolus

"The most common excuse is "When I want to watch a movie, I want to *watch* a movie, not *read* it.", which is akin to "If you're going to live in America, you need to be an English-speaking Christian."" - deusdiabolus

"Looks like a whole lot of people got rocked." - deusdiabolus

"Looks like a whole lot of people got rocked." - deusdiabolus