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The Secret Behind The Real-Time Web - YouTube - http://www.youtube.com/watch...
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inarli, ffctvhd1, JoeCamel and 237 other people liked this
Ross and Dan made this video to illustrate the advanced technology we use behind the scenes at FriendFeed. (Ross and Dan, you are amazing - I can't believe how awesome this thing turned out)
- Bret Taylor
from Bookmarklet
How very creative. This is very fluid and cool.
- Louis Gray
OK, not exactly what I was expecting, but very cool.
- Kevin Arth
Anyone have the video somewhere other than Youtube? it's banned here in Turkey and I can't wait until we get home (next month) to watch it!!
- Chris Myles
Bret, this video should be titled: A Love Song for FriendFeed ! Great vid (and music) !
- Ahsan Ali
This is awesome!
- Christopher Chung
with a community like this - you just can't roll-it into f.b.. keep the dream alive!
- michael sean wright
:O
- Josh Haley
Amazing, thanks for that!
- dkb
According to Ross, they used about 1030 individual pictures in the final version. Stop motion is a lot of work :)
- Bret Taylor
Sure, sure--give away all the secrets. (Are those Lego dudes union?)
- Kathy Fitch
very creative. wonder how long it took to do that stop-action?
- berchman
Ross's best work so far ! great job Ross
- goutham
Major props to Ross and Dan. FriendFeed lives on
- Shane
That's priceless. Great job, guys.
- John Craft
This is superb. I just showed it to my 5 year old son who enjoys Lego and has already taken some great photos, including one or two of his toys. So now he has the seed of the idea that, in time, he could take multiple stills and put them together to make moving pictures. Thank you very much for posting it and giving me and him that opportunity. Maybe, he might use FriendFeed one day too!
- John W Lewis
Great project!
- Anne Bouey
AWESOME!
- Kevin Fox
I think they need to make a full stop-motion version of the Matrix in legos. Now THAT would be awesome. I wonder what bullet-time looks like in LEGO?
- Bret Taylor
i'd pay to see the stop animation lego matrix, but not the sequels
- patrick
"Equipment Generously Provided By Casey Muller" - hahaha!! THIS IS AWESOMESAUCE!!! I love the creative energy and vibe in this video... LOTS of work went into that one! Thanks guys!! :)
- Susan Beebe
Genius, how much time did that all take?
- Wayne Hornsey
Chris Myles: if you want ot - DM me an address and I'll mail you a copy.
- guruvan (Rob Nelson)
That is so awesome
- Glenn Slaven
happy-making!
- Felicia Yue
I am more proud than ever for being a FriendFeeder :)
- Arvind
Wow!!!!!
- Mona Nomura
Excellent!!
- Kol Tregaskes
That's great!
- Devon Govett
Cool! The friendfeed's manufactury
- Benedetto Vacca
неплохо, неплохо! Продолжение будет?
- atner
Lots of handshaking I see :)
- Nicholas Kreidberg
hahaha very nice stop motion and music!
- Alex Huinchucleffy
BUMP
- Roberto Bonini
FULL OF WIN
- Jac Falcon
McCain ad in "FIFA '07" - http://yooryoo.com/
OnHold India, Karim, Jon Anderson and 4 other people liked this
you know those are photoshopped, right? just want to make sure
- Cee Bee
should put those adds in MS Flight Simulator 2.0 for Windows 98.
- Erik Weese
Beautifully written with amazing Content which made me fan of your blog http://www.cellhub.com/t-mobil... Motorola DEFY
- Gary Warner
You are so RETIRED!
Seyhan Çelik, Ugur Sahin, Roger Benningfield and 85 other people liked this
Thanks to my friend Charlie LOL
- Mona Nomura
Obviously, someone wasn't working their way through collage.
- Ⓒⓗⓡⓘⓢ Ⓟⓘⓡⓘⓛⓛⓞ
LMAO!!!!
- Rah-PM 2012
You are Retired, I'm so serial!
- Jeff P. Henderson
I'd love to know what forum this was on. That was funny. :D
- Brad Butner
from twhirl
she's so retired
- Alfredo 亜瑠布れっど
Brad it was on Realpics.net, here is her profile http://www.realpics.net/REALDic...
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
Sean: Yeah, I'm still trying to find the thread, realpics has horrible thread navigation.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
I can't believe this is real LOL!
- Mona Nomura
from iPhone
It isn't real. It's implants. Duh.
- Ⓒⓗⓡⓘⓢ Ⓟⓘⓡⓘⓛⓛⓞ
It looks like it's part of a story or something. What is it?
- Michael Fidler
I still haven't found the thread, damn Realpics needs to get their' search together.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
That's hilarious.
- John (bird whisperer)
hey, i'm Martyyyy on Realpics. about it being a story, some dude asked her for nudes, and she said no. and he called her a pussy if i remember correctly. so she defended herself by saying she used to be a stripper, and then the rest of it is right in front of you.
- Martyyyy
She is so cute.
- JohnDu™
Holy cow - she didn't even spell retarded right on her profile where she talked about the mix up... look -->
- Mark "Rizzn" Hopkins
i must thank sites for making my profile views go up because of my retarted and retired mix up with threads like: http://www.neogaf.com/forum... http://digg.com/comedy... http://digg.com/comedy... http://www.reddit.com/r... http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthr... http://twitter.com/popurls...
- Mark "Rizzn" Hopkins
I was just typing a comment about her use of "retarted," when Rizzn's comments popped up. She's definitely "diffrnt."
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Wow, major vocab FAIL!
- Rick Cogley
It's pretty retired to lunch into a asspletive attack when you bearly read end rite OMFG ... poor thing has a future full of *facepalm* ahead of her!
- Richard Walker
lol.
- Will Higgins™
Leaning disability ? Get a cane, you Re-tired!
- Richard Walker
LMAO
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
Enough said
- Kevin J Hatton
GTFO biaaatch!
- Ceren Şekerci
I had forgotten about this! LOL.
- ha3rvey (Hugs 50% off!)
One of the latest comments from her Profile "Hey RDS, hows that hooked on phonics coming along? Clearly not working, inquire about a refund."
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
Duuuuuude how in the world did you find this Jimminy?!
- Mona Nomura
Mona, search was working pretty well at the time, can't remember what I was looking for though. Edit: I searched for "pussy comments:jimminy" trying to find a post from a week or two ago where I posted "P is for pussy, that's good enough for me." Didn't find it though. Embarrassed.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
+101010101
- Mark Davidson
Duh. She totally thought it said "retireded".
- surf guitar
Photo Theme #2 Feedback: Reflections - I decided to enter a few photographs into theme competitions. I'm working on JPG mag's themes and I need to choose just one. I'm still narrowing the photos down, but I thought I would get some feedback from all of you as well. The theme is Reflections, all of these are from Antarctica. Which would you choose?
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Kevin Fox, Will Higgins™, Morton Fox and 12 other people liked this
I've uploaded each of these 6 in a larger format, so click on any to see more detail! Also see my options for Theme #1 Frozen here: http://friendfeed.com/sf-bay-...
- Rachel Lea Fox
4 or 6. Who doesn't love penguins?
- The original Kevin
The fourth one.
- Anne Bouey
Thank you Glen and Kevin!! Kevin, I adore my penguins, but I keep asking myself if they are right for the photography magazine or if one of the others is more likely to be voted for? Thoughts?
- Rachel Lea Fox
2 and 6 are my favorites. 6 really blows me away; the colors are just amazing; so many different shades of white! I would love to see #6 in high resolution.
- Jeanette Bosman
Wow, these are fantastic. But I agree with Glen, if it's reflection you're going for then 2 or 5 would be the most interesting and reflective ones. 6 is cute but not enough reflection. Between 2 or 5 though I'd go with 2. 5 looks a little too washed out comparatively in my eyes.
- ronin
#2 for a contest. I also really like #1.
- joey
Glen, I've been thinking that about #4. On #3 I'm on the fence as even just the colors reflect creating a shape that spreads in both directions. But the others might be better anyway. I think I might be leaning towards #5 but I'm just not sure.
- Rachel Lea Fox
#4 struck me as a beautiful place for reflection as well as a portrayal of reflection!
- Anne Bouey
Hmmmm, Ya, I didn't really consider the "reflection" part as much. From that perspective, 2 is the strongest. Tho if you cropped the penguin photo more tightly, it might bring out the penguin reflections more. But it might not be as strong of a photo.
- The original Kevin
the penguins are amazing!
- hollyrae
Just wanted to say I sure like #3, regardless of the theme
- Brian Joseph
Brian & Holly Rae, Thank you so much!!
- Rachel Lea Fox
My fave is #6, but I think #5 would be best for the theme.
- Shannon Jiménez
cool!
- keiko-san
Thanks Keiko! And wow this is an old post. Didn't expect to see that pop back up! :)
- Rachel Lea Fox
Ice Cream Dessert Recipes - http://www.cookiemag.com/food...
Anna Lynn M., Rochelle, mohammadk and 11 other people liked this
"Whip up these sweet, gooey, refreshing summer treats and show the ice cream man that he's got some competition. ... Cool Raspberry Slices ... Classic Chocolate-Chip Cookie Ice Cream Sandwiches ... Peanut-Butter Parfait Cups"
- RAPatton
Those "Cool Raspberry Slices" do look cool, but I think the Classic Chocolate-Chip Cookie Ice Cream Sandwiches are more my style
- RAPatton
Oh my, more to feed my ice cream addiction.
- Sally - Skyrimmin' It
Any female who says she is ok with being a "friend with benefits" is lying to themselves. Stop it, you're worth more.
Raecheal, Dawn, Melanie Reed and 65 other people liked this
Bah! FWB is an awesome state of being.
- Sparky, lurking
Finally someone is talking the truth. Some straight talk is just what some people need IMHO. Thanks for putting your words down.
- David Damore
When it comes down to it, everyone wants to be loved and feel secure. The sooner you figure that out, the sooner you'll be happier. ;)
- Mona Nomura
Having had a few of these who were actively dating other people and easily moved on when they found someone they actually wanted to be with, I'm going to have to disagree. Yeah, there is some physical and general some emotional attraction, but it is still possible to separate sex from love. The problem comes when you remain good friends (with benefits) for too long, eventually the wires will get crossed, especially the more you go through together.
- xero
There is nothing wrong with actively dating, but just the "friends with benefits" is a load of crap. EVERY female is worth more than a quickie at 3am with no cuddling and day time outings.
- Mona Nomura
@Mona: Who says she has to get the quickie, the cuddling, and the daytime outings all from the same person?
- Roger Benningfield
...but why can't one just enjoy being loved in the moment?
- .LAG liked that
No one, Roger - but clearly that's what she is looking for. :) @.LAG In the moment is great... in the moment, but when the moment extends to longer moments, and longer moments, and even longer moments, it's human nature and a necessity that with love, comes trust, security, friendship, etc., etc. And if those needs aren't met or balanced, the drama ensues LOL
- Mona Nomura
Mona, are you saying that a woman is not capable of having a purely sexual urge that needs to be met without a romantic emotional urge attached to it?
- xero
true but it goes both ways. One person always wants more than the other in those situations and it's not always the lady.
- Anna Lynn M.
Xero - yes. @Anna: But why wouldn't she want more? What was she (or he) doing with the other person in the first place? ;)
- Mona Nomura
...Mona, it's that "drama" that keeps relationships interesting...and viable.
- .LAG liked that
Oh boy. I have close to zero tolerance for drama, I'm all about stability. Been there, done that, no thanks! Perhaps that's where we differ. ;)
- Mona Nomura
"more" is unattainable.
- Anthony Citrano
I loathe drama. Completely.
- Jonathan Hardesty
...some times, you just don't want more from that person. It's fun and that's all it is. It's not that you feel less worthy of a "real" relationship...some times that's all you want to deal with because there are other things in life going on. But you definitely have to be a very secure person to really honestly be ok with that kind of relationship..just my 2 cents.
- Anna Lynn M.
I think you may be projecting then Mona, considering this huge sexual revolution that women have been on for years, and my past experience, past friends, and psychological studies -- I'm going to fully disagree. It has been suggested that there is a genetic component to the women who can not separate the two feelings, but the studies I've seen have all shown overwhelming evidence that...
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- xero
Ack, drama. I have a 20ft no drama radius. I suggest everyone acquire one. ;)
- xero
Xero - That's what I've been saying, you just worded it differently LOL. And I agree with the drama. Been there, done that, no thanks. ;)
- Mona Nomura
Mona, your comments sound more like a fuckbud than friends with benefits. Real FWB are friends more than anything else.
- Sparky, lurking
So what happens when one wants more than the other? Or starts to get attached? It's human nature, the longer you spend time with the person, you want to have something tangible and solid. As a female, if we set the tone with "friends with benefits", that's how the man will only see you as: "friends with benefits" or you'd end up as last resort. :(
- Mona Nomura
But it's not that it's not possible, it's just that people put themselves into those relationships without setting down ground rules, either personal ones or consensual ones. Then things change over time sometimes, maybe they get to know each other better, etc. Sometimes one of the people actually wants to be romantically involved with the other and they accept the other arrangement as a way to bide their time. Those situations will NEVER work out.
- xero
Honesty is always the best policy. And most of the time, people are not honest with themselves and or each other -- that's when things (feelings) get imbalanced and one party ends up getting hurt, mainly the female, more often times than not.
- Mona Nomura
Agreed, Mona. It's usually one person who gets more attached than the other, or there's some kind of failure to communicate that happens somewhere along the way. For all my talk, I'd probably get too attached the fastest. :P
- Jonathan Hardesty
You're not the only one, Jonathan! ;)
- Mona Nomura
Heh. For all my "walls," I am kind of easy like that. Hence the need to create walls. :P
- Jonathan Hardesty
I want a friend with benefits. Waaaah!
- vimoh
what?
- Pokai
Nobody ever actually *wants* a friend with benefits, those occur when you're in a situation in which something is preventing you from having a continued relationship. Most people actually just want someone they can booty call as needed, a "fuck buddy" if you will. You have to remember that a FWB situation only generally occurs naturally if two existing friends decide that the other "will do" for getting out sexual frustration.
- xero
Like I said, the idea of FWB appeals to me. Right now it's more of a sexual thing than a relationship thing. Now, whether or not that would work or turn into another long-term thing remains to be seen. But there's something to being with someone for however long...
- Jonathan Hardesty
Are you sure that you're not looking for a casual relationship (dating with no expectations or long-term plans) instead of FWB?
- xero
Could be. I dunno.
- Jonathan Hardesty
God I'm so not keeping up with this convo. Mona - if one wants more than the other then you talk about it like adults. People do actuall want friends with benefits - often when I'm single I hook up with close friends who are also single. We don't want relationships from each other beyond our close friendship but hey - why not party with your pants off once in a while? It's all about communication and having fun with your friends.
- Sparky, lurking
Sex can be a beautiful act of love between two people. It can also just be sex. Mind blowing, toe curling, swinging from the chandeliers sex.
- Sparky, lurking
@Sparky, the original comment was concerning females. I believe I know most all men can separate the two - physical sex/emotional sex. I cannot separate the two.
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
Why can't you be loved by one person, and FWB with a few others?
- Chris Charabaruk
Way to stir up the mob Mona ;)
- Tony C (Unrated)
I tried that randomly sleeping around thing. It didn't work out. It's possible I just so happened to only sleep with chicks that wanted to put a ring on it though...LOL
- Rah-PM 2012
Personally, or empirically Chris? Personally, it's not whether I can or can't separate sex and love, it's that I don't want to separate sex and love (or perhaps better phrased as "lovingness"). If I'm scromping with someone I'm trusting them with my life and that's not something I take lightly. For me to have that kind of trust of a person, I had to know them well and by the time I know...
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- FFing Enigma
I was just trying to be humorous. That said, some people are better at separating sex and emotions than others... I've met guys where they go hand-in-hand, and I've met girls who could only love one guy, but have no problem sexing up anyone else.
- Chris Charabaruk
Really, it's just that some folk don't particularly see these things as having to go together. TBH, I'm one of them. Just the way I am.
- Chris Charabaruk
Mona, what you say is true...for Mona. But to impose your standards on others is presumptuous at best and intolerant at worst. Recast your remark substituting for "friends with benefits" the words "lesbian", "bottom", "sex worker", "polyamorous", "mother", "schoolteacher", "single", "childless", "executive", etc., and you'll see that you're denying your sisters the sovereignty to define...
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- Alan Chamberlain
Completely agree with you Mona.
- dpurrington
+++Sparky, Chris, tiffany & Roger.
- Anika
Mona is right. If you turn yourself into a piece of ass, you're going to wind up with the self-esteem of a piece of ass. In the end, you'll feel insecure, unloved and used. That's just the way life works. People who think they can separate their bodies from their spirits are just fooling themselves.
- Dawn
Dawn - if you look at it like that then yes. Having sex doesn't mean you are a piece of ass though. Also: sometimes it's hot to feel used ;)
- Sparky, lurking
That's sexist. Why wouldn't you think that a women wouldn't enjoy the same pleasures as a man? Plus, men can be just a "piece of ass" too.
- BEX
What's wrong with being sexy?
- dpurrington
Women are wired differently than men. Women are psychologically wired to nest with one protective mate. Men are much more capable of having frivolous multiple contacts; they don't have the same pulls on their heart, mind and spirit. Call that sexist if you want to, but I didn't create the biology.
- Dawn
Men and woman are biologically different. The sooner we understand why we (males and females) do what we do, life for both parties involved is a lot easier. We (as society) are so hung up on equality, a lot of lines get blurred -- and the sooner we shift mindsets to celebrating (and appreciating!) differences instead of trying to prove we are "just as good or better", the sooner the...
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- Mona Nomura
Alan said exactly what I was thinking. Trying to dictate how or why someone should act sexually, esepecially because of their gender, just ends up frustrating everyone. I hope we're past that as a society.
- Andy Bakun
I did it for a while. Sometimes I was happy, many times I was sad, in the end I was pissed off and never spoke to the guy again. I don't really recommend it, but I think it was about all I could do at the time. My options are pretty limited out here in the Midwest. I'm just very fortunate that I finally found my full-blown loving boyfriend after so many years. It took finding the right...
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- Kamilah Reed (K. Gill)
Kamilah - I am so happy for you :) As for people coming in using words like "dictating" should take a close look at what myself (Dawn, plus a few others) are saying. Otherwise, we are going to keep talking in circles. And sub (jo), I completely disagree with your statement "there is absolutely nothing wrong with women who associate their self esteem with the men or women they sleep...
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- Mona Nomura
Oh most definitely tiffany, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a sexual female. :) sub (jo): self defining self esteem I agree with, but lying to yourselves or delusions is the problem and more often times than not leads to hurt, trauma, and or drama.
- Mona Nomura
"any female who says she is okay with FWB is lying to themsevles" sounds like dictating to me.
- Andy Bakun
What am I dictating, Andy? I just made a statement. How you react to the statement is not up to me, it's up to you. :)
- Mona Nomura
WOMEN HAVE BRAINS, people! We're not just slaves to our hormones and organs in EITHER direction. There's nature, and there's also nurture. This makes for infinite diversity. Saying that all women are the same is just plain irrational. We can come up with our own thoughts that have more influence over our actions and desires than any wiring and that oxytocin stuff. Also, many women AREN'T worth more, because they didn't use their brains to be worth more.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Biological determinism is overrated. Human beings have subverted biological drives for hundreds of thousands of years. Civilization is built on the systematic subversion of these drives. And in any case, there are plenty of examples throughout the animal kingdom where the gender roles don't always go that way.
- Victor Ganata
Of course women have brains. But it's also important to understand females tend to react emotionally. Once a female embraces that fact and males understand females are wired differently, things become a lot easier. (For ALL relationships i.e. friendships, colleagues, love, etc.)
- Mona Nomura
Who are you to judge what other women think, seriously? What's right for YOU isn't right for all women. Get that straight, and you'll begin to understand.
- Jillian York
I think it's important to understand that individual people are wired differently. We're not just all archetypes of our particular gender. A man who believes every man thinks the same is going to be at a disadvantage. I would imagine it's the same for a woman who assumes such things about other women.
- Victor Ganata
See? Case in point. Who are YOU Jillian, and why are you so upset with me?
- Mona Nomura
Men react emotionally, too. If you haven't seen a guy do a shoutingcussypissy dance in the infield because he let a grounder get past him, or because someone shot him dead in Half-Life, you might have missed something--or you might not.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Mage - of course. I am speaking generally. I know MANY males who are more emotional than females. I am speaking in generalities here.
- Mona Nomura
I just found this via someone else's link - you're assuming that women who have the capacity to handle that arrangement are "lying" themselves? I find that utterly judgemental and ridiculous.
- Jillian York
"Human beings have subverted biological drives for hundreds of thousands of years." Oh really? Homo sapiens sapiens have only been on earth for 2 of those "hundreds of thousands of years." And "civilization" has only been around a tiny fraction of that. Yes, humans have the power to "subvert biological drives" but doing so always comes at a cost.
- Dawn
LOL! Not even worth it! [edit: oh, I suppose that means 2 (100k), not 2 (1000). Phwew!
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
And Mona, my upset isn't directed solely at you but at the generations of women who've had this idea pushed down their throats by other women. You're perpetuating gender stereotypes.
- Jillian York
Jillian - that was a rhetorical question. It doesn't matter who you are, everyone is welcome in my feed. I am going to say the same thing I said to Andy. I just made a statement, how you react to the statement is up to you. :) As for your latter comment, I am copying what I wrote above: "We (as society) are so hung up on equality, a lot of lines get blurred -- and the sooner we shift...
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- Mona Nomura
Who cares? People do what they do. We're animals, right?
- Tyler Hurst
Jillian, once you get to my age, you'll understand that "women who have the capacity to handle that arrangement" are their own harshest judges as they look back and think "What the hell was I doing?!" I've talked to countless women who see later in life the damage they inflicted on themselves.
- Dawn
Mona, if you believe in those differences, then you should also believe in the differences between groups of women. I accept and believe that for you - and many, many other women - a "friends with benefits" situation makes you feel less worthy. For other women - myself included at certain times in life - it makes me feel empowered and complete. You and I fundamentally agree that men and women are different, but I also agree that not all women are created equal.
- Jillian York
Oh Dawn, come off it. I'm in the best relationship of my life, and committed - but I would never for a second regret the encounters I've had. Monogamy is not right for everyone; just because you've come to see that later in life doesn't mean that I will feel the same way. I'm sorry for your regrets - I have none.
- Jillian York
I'm willing to admit that the percentage off women who can handle FWB may well be lower than the percentage of men who can. However, I just can't let anyone say a woman can't do it. People used to claim that women couldn't be mass-murderers and that men couldn't be nurturing. Nature has examples of males who are wired for one mate for life, and probably has an example of profligate females. We are too complex to pigeonhole.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
I agree, MiniMage - I don't doubt that the experiences of those women are true. But I also know countless women my mother's age who remain uncommitted, or who found marriage to be their worst mistake (just like I did). These same people who are coming to accept the differences between men and women should accept the differences between WOMEN.
- Jillian York
I don't have any regrets. And being "friends with benefits" is not the same thing as having had one sexual partner your whole life.
- Dawn
My stance on monogamy has been changing lately. At this point in my life, I'm not entirely sure I want to "love" just one person, or even have something long term and exclusive. Just thought I would throw that out there. I think that there are women out there who could do FWB, but I haven't met them.
- Jonathan Hardesty
I will say though, I haven't met a lot of people, so take that how you will. :P
- Jonathan Hardesty
Dawn, not sure I understood that last part or how it pertains to me.
- Jillian York
You're confusing what monogamy is. It means having one sexual partner for a period of time. People can be FWB and be monogamous. And when you say, "Monogamy is not right for everybody," and also say you're in a "committed" relationship, your statements are in conflict.
- Dawn
"These same people who are coming to accept the differences between men and women should accept the differences between WOMEN." Jillian nails it! Women aren't the same. Look, the "women are made differently" argument is old & tired. It's been used to force women into marriages they didn't want, deny women the right to vote, get an education or own property, and keep girls out of football, baseball and other opportunities. Seriously, I'd like to see that dropped. Women can bear young. Men can't. I get it.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Mage, Women ARE made differently and we are in 2009. I respect the fight and the paths past women (and males) fought to get us to where we are. That said, I still deal with racism and sexism almost everyday -- actually, depending on how I look at it, life could've been horrible for me. I am Asian. I am female. But even if I am called China-girl in 2009, even if I am female, even if I am...
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- Mona Nomura
The problem I have is the implicit devaluation of other people's experiences. How can you assume how much someone values a certain situation without knowing them very well?
- Victor Ganata
Mona, you have said that you don't believe in luck. You believe each person determines his or her own fate. However, you don't believe a woman can decide that she doesn't want more than to have a friend with benefits? How do you reconcile this?
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Dawn, I know what friends with benefits means. I've done it, and it worked for me at that point of time in my life. Being committed NOW doesn't conflict with the belief that monogamy isn't always right. We change and develop our entire life, and my philosophy is to go with what feels right at the time and live without regrets. I'm committed now because, for the first time ever in my life, it feels like the right choice. I've also been married, and that felt like the wrong choice.
- Jillian York
Victor - Can you put it more simply? I don't understand what you are trying to ask me. @Mage: It's because a lot of females try to live up to the anti-societal stereotypes. Like I keep saying, we are in 2009. Not 1950.
- Mona Nomura
Mona, when you render a judgment like that, you're de-valuing people's experiences. My question is, how do you know what a particular experience is worth to another person, without actually knowing the person?
- Victor Ganata
Mona, again, that's your opinion, and like Victor said, you're de-valuing people's experiences. Yes, there are women who do certain things to stick it to the man; there are also many women who do what feels right to them. By placing your assumptions on all of us, you're no better than the rest.
- Jillian York
Ok. If you say so. We are just talking in circles. But I still stand by my statement and excusing certain behaviors by assigning whatever reasoning only gives justification for people to not re-examine themselves and why they do the certain things they do. :)
- Mona Nomura
Hopefully, people can at least understand that Jillian's "do whatever feels good at the time" sexual philosophy creates instability that is very harmful to children, which explains why there have been societal pressures against it.
- Dawn
Circles is right. I will have to give up. As for me, I will try to allow each his or her own personhood and right to determine for himself or herself what makes him/her happy, no matter what year it is, no matter what chromosomes he/she was born with. Why? Because no one can truly understand every human mind, and how each one is shaped by his/her experiences.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
I'd also be careful about being too categoric about what is "very harmful to children", because a lot less is harmful to children than one thinks (it might not be "very good" but its not harmful) except direct and indirect abuse. And a happy, balanced etc. parent is far better than anything else
- Iphigenie
Mona writes: "We (as society) are so hung up on equality". Ah, would that that were true, alas. The fight for marriage equality continues, for example, and a great many in our society are vehemently opposed to it. Until we (as society) are able to tolerate diversity, not simply of gender or race, but of experience, philosophy, sexual response, and beliefs, we should continue to be "hung...
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- Alan Chamberlain
As long as we recognize that it's a judgment call and not an empiric truth, I guess we'll have to leave it at that.
- Victor Ganata
i am sure it was prompted by a real life situation, probably watching a friend in a hurtful situation - and in that context it probably makes a lot of sense. If it affects your perceived value of yourself, then goodness! never do it, whatever it is
- Iphigenie
Oh of course, I stand by all my girlfriends who get into the FWB (for whatever reason they choose to) and am there when they need a shoulder, Mage. :) @Alan - You're not understanding me, and that is ok. It's not about "tolerating" or "equality". It's about understanding and celebrating the differences. Word connotations automatically lead to offense and defense, which is why there are so many issues that aren't resolute. @Victor - it is the truth.
- Mona Nomura
What is the litmus test for something being a judgment call vs an empirical truth? because that test itself is a judgment call - I know this empirically.
- Micah
Give me some evidence! n = 1 is a sucky sample size, n =2 only marginally less sucky ;)
- Victor Ganata
doesnt it all boil down to expectations? If the girl or guy says they are OK but actually hope for more, then it will be painful sooner or later, and it will affect self esteem, Mona is right about that. If they have no expectations or wish to be more, and just enjoy intimacy now and then, but clearly think of each other as just friends with no expectations, then it can work. The ones I know who do are transient (a couple times then no more) or occcasional (every few months, not more often).
- Iphigenie
I can agree with that. Anyone who thinks FWB is a stable situation that can last indefinitely is going to be disappointed eventually.
- Victor Ganata
Well Dawn, maybe that's true and maybe it isn't - but I don't WANT children, so that's quite irrelevant. Also, I am with Victor in that FWB is not a lasting situation - but it is one that some women can enjoy emotionally unscathed and perhaps even better for having.
- Jillian York
I'm out too, but thank you Mona, for inspiring a blog post!
- Jillian York
I have a hard time believing that even men want FWB perpetually (well, except for maybe on FFer), but who actually says that's all they'll ever want? Some men or women could be fine with it for a year or two, or a decade or two. We all have the ability to change our minds, and it doesn't make our previous experiences any less invalid. Yeah, that doggoned little toast-thingy that keeps popping up the conversations dragged me back. I'm really incapable of letting it go.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Hopefully, this thread would be helpful to people reading and understanding all takes to making a choice that is right for them. :) I'm all about self growth, re-examination, and learning from other people!
- Mona Nomura
i seriously doubt there's ever been a guy version of this conversation -- "Any male who says he is bothered by being a 'friend with benefits' is lying to himself" -- possibly because most guys would agree. :-D while there are always individual differences, *generally* speaking, men and women are wired differently on this point. this difference was summed up by Woody Allen in "Love & Death." SONJA: Sex without love is an empty experience. BORIS: But as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
- Karim
thus this conversation has always gone. which leads me to believe that biological determinism, in this case, is *underrated* not *overrated* :-D
- Karim
Karim, I doubt there's ever been a guy version of "women don't have souls," or "women are too delicate for discussions about politics," or "women do not have the mental capacities for education," or "women shouldn't own property," or "women should stay in the home and serve their men." Thus, your argument is meaningless to me.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Mini, not sure i understand your point. is it that "women don't have souls" and "it's ok to be promiscuous" are both *cultural* differences and not biologically-driven? maybe just my ignorance, but i'm just not aware of any cultures in which promiscuity was acceptable for women but shameful for men. even if there was one, it seems like the number of male-promiscuous cultures outnumber the ones that aren't to the point it suggests biology is the culprit.
- Karim
tiffany, i guess i'd agree. my point is that you rarely see guys emotionally conflicted about FWB or promiscuity *as soon as* or *as often as* you see women conflicted about it -- not that men are *never* conflicted about it, nor that women *never* are in the mood for what Erica Jong called a "zipless fuck" in the 1970s :-D
- Karim
I agree
- orionstarr
Mona, I read your statement, disagreed with it, and then read the comments. Wow, FFers, pretty good job on a sensitive topic. But I don't get it when you deny being judgmental. "I stand by all my girlfriends who get into the FWB (for whatever reason they choose to) and am there when they need a shoulder." Except how could it be safe for one of your friends to come to you? After you've...
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- Daniel Dulitz
It's easier to give people what they want from me, when I understand where they are coming from. Because I know (or made up my mind to) what I know, my friends do not need me to disrupt their peace of minds and or screw with their reasonings behind their actions. I also have nothing to prove to myself or to them so I do not even attempt changing their minds, hence it helps me become a better friend to them. :) And Karim - I always appreciate your thoughtful, witty, and very wise comments. :)
- Mona Nomura
Karim, what I'm saying is that people have used "women are different" for thousands of years to deny women this or that. It's just more of the same to claim that no woman can be happy with FWB, just because she's got an innie.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
tiffany, I think you've pointed at the reason for the disagreement here: Surely there is some level of mutual affection and respect between romantic love on one extreme, and, on the other extreme, using someone else as a Kleenex to masturbate into.
- Mitch Wagner
+1 MiniMage, Tiffany, and Mitch.
- Anthony Citrano
wow 124 comments later and still no agreement :O now thats a shocker
- Tony C (Unrated)
LOL Who said men that are promiscuous aren't viewed that way, too. Personally I never go after "players" because more often times then not, they are making up for something they are lacking and I am way out of their leagues. ;) And you guys talk as though we are in 1950 and not 2008. I respect, remember, and grateful of the history, but am not stuck in those times.
- Mona Nomura
Mona *blush* thanks... :-D Mini, well, i'm not trying to deny women anything, i'm not even making a value judgement about whether men or women are "right" -- just saying that when you have this huge discrepancy in sexual attitudes that seems to transcend time and culture, the cause *might* be biological not cultural. just because people have used differences (real & imagined) to repress women doesn't mean the (real) differences don't exist or that pointing them out is tantamount to repression. :-D
- Karim
Repression might not even be the point, or it might be repression, "Sorry, honey, you can't feel the way you believe you feel, because you're a woman. Whatever you believe about yourself is wrong." Yeah, that might actually be repression. I believe that FWB cannot work for most of us (talking both genders) most of the time, but I would not be so presumptious as to assume it is impossible for any subset of the population for at least a little while. Why the heck do I keep coming back to this?
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
I guess the assumption I have a problem with is the notion that biologically-driven is necessarily better. If we stuck to biological drives and didn't act on our higher functions, we wouldn't have civilization.
- Victor Ganata
Because you feel so strongly and passionately about it, and I respect that Mage :) @Victor - yes, but take a look at civilization and the various tiers (for the lack of better term) of society and its people. What makes one "better" or "worse"? What makes one believe they are "better" or "worse". Ugh - this is a direction I do not want to go LOL
- Mona Nomura
Victor, my assumption is *not* that biologically-driven differences are "better" than culturally-driven ones. in fact the culturally-driven ones are better because they are software, not hardware: a culture can revise or drop a belief that doesn't work. whereas if your hormones tend to make you believe something, that's *hardwired* into the culture. sure, a few enlightened souls might see past their programming :-D but that doesn't always get passed on to the next generation.
- Karim
i guess i'm thinking of all the stuff i've read about how complex behaviors later in life -- like whether you're aggressive, or passive, whether you like to build forts or play with dolls, etc. -- is very often influenced by minuscule hormonal changes in the womb. while i'm willing to consider an argument that attitudes about promiscuity and FWB are culturally-generated, it seems more...
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- Karim
Mini, *my* point certainly isn't to repress anyone. don't want to be an apologist for Mona since she is more than capable of speaking for herself :-D
- Karim
More than that, it's an oversimplification of biology to believe that just because you have two X chromosomes, you're going to behave a certain way. I could agree with "some", maybe even "most", but certainly not "all". Not everyone has the same hormones coursing through their blood at the same concentrations, and not all of them will respond to the hormones in the same way anyway. Any statement you make about an entire gender is not going to be true for 100% of the cases.
- Victor Ganata
Victor, i agree with that. i've tried to qualify things by using phrases like "very often" so it's clear i'm not talking about something being true for 100% of anything. once you've spent some time looking up aneuploidy ("yikes! you can have *five* X chromosomes???") it's clear there is wonderful variation in sexual biology.
- Karim
i guess i'm thinking that if women's feelings about FWB and promiscuity are *cultural*, then the men are not getting the same cultural programming. either our culture should instruct men to be just as monogamous and prudent sexually as women, or instruct women to be just as sexually profligate as men. granted there'd be a few people who won't get with the program, but you could probably eliminate most of the cultural difference and most of the age-old argument.
- Karim
Karim, yeah, other than the fact that many (but not all) genotypic women can give birth while all genotypic men can't, there really isn't any other behavior that can be exclusively attributed to either gender.
- Victor Ganata
if it's *not* cultural -- if being more prudent than promiscuous just comes along for the ride as part of the biological machinery of being a woman -- then there's no end to the difference, really... Sonja & Boris have the same conversation forever ;-)
- Karim
Victor, yeah there's no behavior that can be *exclusively* attributed (as in 100%) to either gender, though you really don't need to get to 100% to say that IN GENERAL, girls like doing certain things that boys don't and vice versa. that is common sense. the question for me is whether you looking at cultural differences (that can be changed), or biological differences (that are hard-wired).
- Karim
Karim, true, but then we get to the question of whether such a difference is biologically-driven or whether it's a social construct. This question will probably never be answered, but I'm just always wary of blanket statements that preclude the possibility of individual variation.
- Victor Ganata
And THAT, Karim, is all I'm saying. One simply cannot truthfully say that 100% of women can't do FWB happily. I'm not saying it can't be true of 51-99%. And personally, I think that if there is a disparity between the percentages of men who can and women who can, it's a societal construct. Thousands of years of women being told that they can not behave the way men do has continued to be extremely effective, I believe.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
The point is: make blanket statements and let people answer if they are or are not the exception. If you keep adding "but"s and "and"s, it gives people excuses to pinpoint blame elsewhere, instead of looking at themselves first. If you know you are the exception, why do you need to prove it?
- Mona Nomura
Victor, i think you can address the question. it's hard but not impossible to find evidence of biological programming. you could possibly survey people with a sex-linked monosomy or triosomy, or people who had hormonal exposure in utero for their attitudes on FWB and promiscuity. or survey general population attitudes by level of hormone. much more easily, social scientists should be able to find evidence of cultural effects on attitudes toward promiscuity, if they exist.
- Karim
Mage - I'm still really curious as to why you keep talking about repression and societal constructs of males and females. Karim already said he is not and I have stated numerous times I have not. I wish people would examine themselves, their situations, themselves, as well as biological factors to determine what is right for THEM.
- Mona Nomura
the sad thing is that after years of research, the results would be published in the newspaper as "Women have greater negative attitude to promiscuity than men," and everyone would go "DUH! Why is Science always telling us things we already know?" lol
- Karim
Hahahhahahhahahahaha!! +++++++++++++++ Karim!
- Mona Nomura
I know at least 3 guys who were FWB with women, and wanted to actually have a real relationship with them, and the girl reminded them that, no, they agreed to just being FWB. Hanging out was fun, sex is great...but didn't want to move into "official' relationship territory. Are the guys also worth more than that?
- Andru Edwards
Dru - that is a question they need to answer themselves. ;)
- Mona Nomura
Mona, I missed the part where you said it was possible that some females exist who could possibly do the FWB thing quite happily for a while. I seem to have a really serious reading retention problem today.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
It's somewhere in this thread or one of the other ones... this was a hot topic last night LOL
- Mona Nomura
How come the guys have to answer it for themselves, but the women are all, by default, worth more than that?? :P
- Andru Edwards
Dru LOL Because females are better than males, of course! KIDDING, FOLKS!
- Mona Nomura
Andru, it's a good question! The cliche in pop culture is that it's almost always the woman who sobs to her friends about feeling like a piece of meat, who is left behind when she wants to cuddle, who insists on getting married, etc. and the guy who has the post-coital need to abruptly leave, etc. etc. it's almost certain that those cliched roles are reversed some of the time, and that it's sometimes a *guy* who might need to realize that he's "worth more than that." but i don't know how often.
- Karim
Of course it goes both ways. But more often times than not, it is harder for females to... hold on, I already covered this. Need to go look for my comment so I can just copy and paste.
- Mona Nomura
the one example of a male in pop culture along similar lines is "Alfie," where the protagonist is a promiscuous male. he slowly comes to realize he should have picked one and settled down.
- Karim
No. It's about different methods we communicate. Most of the time, females cling because they really like the guy, thought there was something more (for one reason or another), and is hurt and or angry. And guys, more often times than not, give lame excuses like: "You deserve someone better." Stop that. That just gives false hope. If you tell her straight up: "I am sorry I hurt you, but...
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- Mona Nomura
Sorry but this sounds a lot like Hollywood crap and/or high school garbage. You see all the time in movies and TV shows, but it is really running that rampant? Those three guys I mentioned, that happened we were in our very late teens/early 20s, very immature age. Does this really happen a lot past, say, 21?!
- Andru Edwards
YES.
- Mona Nomura
from IM
Mini, sorry, just seeing your last comment. I am certainly willing to consider any evidence that the difference between male and female promiscuity is cultural if you care to offer any :-)
- Karim
fanofnomuristic
- pb:
Karim, when I was in college, certain athletes would get together every semester and post a "freak list." It was a horrible thing for a female to be listed there. If a young woman'd had her way with a bunch of them, she made the list. Guys did not make the list. For the most part, this public shaming was not done to, uh, GENEROUS guys. You can't blame this on physiology. The message was...
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- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Mage - I don't think that is culture, but more defense physiology or basically defense mechanisms when people feel threatened.
- Mona Nomura
from IM
In addition to Mona's other incredible qualities, apparently she is also telepathic :p
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
Mini, that's interesting! though i'm not quite letting go of the biological theory yet. i'm guessing you had an idea that promiscuity was bad *prior* to being shown the "freak list" and i'm wondering how/when it develops. does mom give you the "boys only want one thing" talk? do you get the idea from your friends? are you just born knowing it's wrong? stupid men want to know. :-D
- Karim
All I'm asking is why is the normative situation considered superior to the non-normative situation? Why does being outside of the norm require assigning blame or rueful self-examination? It just seems like we're trying to take what is clearly a culturally constructed moral situation, and using vague claims of science to try to pretend that it's completely universal.
- Victor Ganata
"clearly a culturally constructed moral situation" <--??? LOL Uh, no.
- Mona Nomura
How is it not a culturally constructed moral situation, Mona? All I have seen is you saying that everyone really believes what you believe and that they are lying to themselves if they claim otherwise. Isn't such an accusation inherently disrespectful of another person's thoughts and feelings? How is this different than the Christians who all say that atheists REALLY know there is a god and that christianity is true but claim to be atheists so they can sin freely?
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
I am just asking questions that are way below the surface. Why are you so upset Neal?
- Mona Nomura
And couldn't the same kinds of accusations be made of homosexuals? Or of just about anything? Can't I just turn it around and say "Any woman who doesn't believe that they can have a sexual relationship with someone without a romantic one is just lying to themselves"? This is called the "Problem of Incorrigibility"...it is impossible to correct another's internal state.
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
Because you are simply reproducing the same moralizing technique used by every other kind of bigot, but since it is about something you feel strongly about you assert it with no care. I was polyamorous, quite functionally, for 10 years, and my wife and I would not be together if not for having open relationships with other partners when we met. You are taking YOUR way and saying it is...
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- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
Absolutes just don't work for me in most cases. For some women, FWB is a door mat type of scenario - for others, it might actually be their cup of tea. The spectrum of sexual preference is nearly infinite.
- AJ Kohn
I'm sorry, Mona, that was rude of me. I need to take a break, I don't want to alienate anyone, especially you.
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
No, it's ok Neal. I see where you are coming from and I am sorry I offended you. I said this up top, but I am going to paste it again: "The point is: make blanket statements and let people answer if they are or are not the exception. If you keep adding "but"s and "and"s, it gives people excuses to pinpoint blame elsewhere, instead of looking at themselves first. If you know you are the exception, why do you need to prove it? - You (edit | delete)"
- Mona Nomura
And to add: "We (as society) are so hung up on equality, a lot of lines get blurred -- and the sooner we shift mindsets to celebrating (and appreciating!) differences instead of trying to prove we are "just as good or better", the sooner the lines will become invisible. This applies to other issues, too. i.e. race, culture, class, etc."
- Mona Nomura
How about this? When I was 8, I was convinced by older kids that it was acceptable to indulge in some "show & tell" with another. The boy wasn't punished by his parents, but I was severely punished & made to feel like a rotten child ( mother was CRYING). Think this had to leave a lasting impression? Why didn't my chromosomes teach me that this wasn't right in the first place? I believe it's because it's a society thing based on early man's decision to make sure he had control of whose heirs his mate bore.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Mage - I am sorry nobody was there to protect and watch out for you. :(
- Mona Nomura
Mini-mage...the reverse happened to me when I was 9-10. A game of "show me yours" with a bother-sister set of my friends from two streets over led to the little girl being treated like trash while her brother and I were dismissed with "boys will be boys" (ironically, when I was later experimenting with boys, I taught that same neighbor boy a thing or two about being boys ;)). I always...
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- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
Thanks, Mona, but I've experienced worse and lived through it. :) The important thing is to note that I wasn't the first, nor will I be the last. We must not dismiss the ramifications of parents' having locked up their girls for thousands of years while letting the boys run wild. There might be a nature component to it, but I am betting on nurture.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
Oh, and yes, Karim, I absolutely did get the "Don't let some little boy get you off into a corner," talk from my mother and the "Boys will bring you down," talk from my father.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
I agree with nurture. I finally came to terms with the fact my parents were not around and I learned a lot of stuff the hard way -- experience, and watching those around me. That is why when someone said up there (I think it was Daniel?) that since I Tweeted the above statement, I must be a terrible, judgmental friend. But because of what I have been through, I am exactly the opposite;...
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- Mona Nomura
Mini, Neal -- thanks, those anecdotes are definitely ammo for the cultural difference camp. i'll have to think about this a bit more. roughly 5 years old to puberty is the "latency period" in psychoanalytic theory; i didn't think parents would instill any instruction on promiscuity during this *asexual* period. i certainly never got any, but i'm a boy so what do i know. lol thanks for the (scary, traumatic) peek into the mind of an 8 year old girl. :-D
- Karim
@Mona .. what have you been through?
- pb:
LOL I have seen anything and everything from top to bottom. And Mage, Neal, I too, thank you both for sharing your experiences. :)
- Mona Nomura
NP, Mona, I think social media is actually therapy in a way, at least for me. My wife thinks that I feel more free to be me on the net, even though I am transparent about my identity. She (she's getting her Psy.D., so her opinion is informed) thinks my comfort here vs. my discomfort IRL is about the mode of interaction and my PTSD (I, too, had a seriously screwed childhood).
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
And thanks Mage and everyone else who shares with me in that same spirit of transparency.
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
I have no idea what to say now, so forgive me for not saying much other than I am delighted to have so many fluff-less discussions on FriendFeed. I try to operate on the principle that every experience must shape me, and that I must determine how.
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
That's why I love FriendFeed (in particular) so much. We are able to openly exchange our experiences and thoughts and though we may disagree, at least we still respect each other. That's the kind of friendships I have in real life too, so I am usually weary (or terrified) of other social platforms LOL
- Mona Nomura
Indeed. FF is different. Anyone who still think the internet isn't "real" or that "internet relationships are not real" (apologies to MC Lars, Bay Area REPRESENT) need to come to FF and see the depth of some of the interactions.
- Neal "thePuck" Jansons
from IM
@Mona :] ... but have you seen the yellow elephant?? .....// and, from what you seen, what did you like the best?
- pb:
I'm interested in the exchange between Neal ("same language as every other kind of bigot") and Mona ("just asking questions that are way below the surface"). Mona, I felt angry because the typical mode of sexual moralism is to tell people that they're lying to themselves. When I was a child, trusted people told me that I was lying to myself about a lot of things and I believed them,...
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- Daniel Dulitz
+1 Daniel
- Chris Charabaruk
+1000 Mona.
- Valley
Without determining whether it is cultural or ingrained, and qualifying that this is far from universal, a man avoids commitment because he thinks he might be able to do better, while a woman seeks commitment because she thinks he may be right. :-) This has been an interesting discussion, and I'm not persuaded that we've really solved anything. Those who think women who are ok with FWB...
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- Alan Chamberlain
all i found was a pull quote from Kinsey, "There seems to be no question but that the human male would be promiscuous in his choice of sexual partners throughout the whole of his life if there were no social restrictions... The human female is much less interested in a variety of partners." The fact that he qualifies *human* (and not American, Western, European, Modern, etc.) male and...
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- Karim
Karim, please name one human society that doesn't treat females differently. In some African societies, they mutilate girls to keep them chaste and restricted to one man (they make sure that sex isn't pleasant for them). In China, single mothers are treated like outcasts. I just read that in India, girls have to be home by dark. Do boys get burqas? I just read that in India, girls have...
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- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
just saying all human societies treat women "differently" from men isn't saying much. it just implies that men and women *are* different, which they are. :-) what you seem to be implying is that women are always treated *worse* than men in all societies. is that what you mean? i am not a social scientist, but i didn't think that was strictly true, given the existence of...
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- Karim
and just to speculate wildly, i'd say some cultures demonize "temptresses" because men are such easy marks. lol it is widely believed that it takes more effort for men to be celibate than women, and women are the ones holding back, sexually. (whether this is true is another question.) sometimes the same phenomenon occurs in those quitting any addiction. they demonize the thing they're addicted to (cigarette, drink, woman) rather than themselves for being so weak. [reaches for cigarette & glass of gin]
- Karim
I'm not saying women are always treated worse. Remember, I hate when people say what's true of some/most is true of all. In fact, I remember reading that there were some aboriginal cultures where sexual experimentation was encouraged and expected of both girls and boys before marriage. Anyway, I wonder what Sarah Hrdy would say today: http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette...
- MiniMage, enterRUPPted
it's the biological aspect of the divide in (traditional, common) male/female sexual attitudes that makes it so particularly depressing to me.
- edythe
Love is like a game...no way love is like a heaven, so hot
- Yüksel AYDIN
Wow - how did you find this post?! LOL
- Mona Nomura
from IM
know if that anit true what is the world coming too. In females self value is so important because most girls have none and that is plan stupided and it makes me so mad so i love this post thank u
- Raecheal
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"“Power Vampires” take the shape of all kinds of things; your mobile phone charger, digital camera charger, iPod charger, my mother….these items steal energy from you even when not being used for their intended purpose, like making me a sandwich. To combat this massive amount of wasted energy, designer Paulo Oh has come up with a simple plan; unplug them. Not satisfied with simply unplugging them, he also designed this handy outlet called “Hang On Outlet”. It is a basic power outlet with a little extra lip to hold on to your lose plugs, keeping your power management neat and tidy. Designer: Paulo Oh"
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This seems impractical. I think an on/off switch right on the socket, like they have in the UK, is far more likely to be effective.
- dkb
@dkb Well observed. Actually, perhaps a multi-tiered hanging rack that will allow multiple infrequently used electronics to occupy the same space without crowding the outlets is more practical? :)
- See-ming Lee 李思明 SML
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- senem
hahaha sooo want it
- Samantha Johnes
Alberto Vasquez to Alberto's feed, Ideas & Inspiration, Creative Design, Crazy Gadgets, Architectural & Interior Design, Interior Design and Decorating
Pillow light - http://www.inewidea.com/2007...
l i l i, daisyja, sertaç aydoğdu and 7 other people liked this
kullanışsız.
- jorm
genius
- dkb
that's creative for sure!! I definitely want one!!
- Samantha Johnes
Finland offer 100 meg broadband to everyone - http://www.thetechnewsblog.com/2010...
Face stamp - http://www.inewidea.com/2007...
l i l i, daisyja, Manantsoa and 5 other people liked this
Alberto Vasquez to Alberto's feed, Ideas & Inspiration, Creative Design, Crazy Gadgets, Architectural & Interior Design, Interior Design and Decorating
Wind-up lamp - http://www.inewidea.com/2007...
l i l i, daisyja, dkb and آریــوبرزن liked this
Alberto Vasquez to Alberto's feed, Ideas & Inspiration, Creative Design, Crazy Gadgets, Architectural & Interior Design, Interior Design and Decorating
Memory Game Alarm Clock - http://www.inewidea.com/2009...
dkb liked this
Check out this beautiful 360 Aerial Panorama of New York. You need to have QuickTime to view it, but if you want the best quality use the plug-in on the site. It’s amazing with the plug-in loaded! http://www.pixelcase.com.au/vr...
zephyrlily, Wulffy, Kong Yee Peng KMN and 107 other people liked this
I found this photo in the photostream of xmir on Flickr.
- Michael Fidler
is there a link to the orig? I think the FF image is static
- Keith - @tsudo
OK, it should be up!
- Michael Fidler
wow!
- Rob Michael (Atmos Trio)
Let me know if it works. I think the best view is from Governors Island or the from Downtown with the view pointing up.
- Michael Fidler
Over-the-top amazing!
- Rob Michael (Atmos Trio)
Awesome. Like taking the helicopter ride I've been too cheap to pay for...
- Mitchell Tsai
Here's another one of London. Amazing! http://bit.ly/qjf6M
- Michael Fidler
Here's an amazing one. I just let it go, rather than control it; http://www.pixelcase.com.au/vr...
- Michael Fidler
It appears the plug-in is no longer necessary. I'm running it in Chrome without one.
- Michael Fidler
That is pretty amazing.
- Son of Groucho
Nice!
- Kol Tregaskes
This is awesome.
- Mark Krynsky
The viewer appears to be Flash not Quicktime,
- Brian Sullivan
Brian, they changed it since this was first posted back in May. It used to require a VR plug-in which worked with QuickTime, but now it doesn't require anything, However, it looks just as good as before. The images are truly amazing!
- Michael Fidler
New York, New York!!!
- Myrna
Michael - didn't notice the post date-- "Doesn't require anything" -- Flash must be installed so something is required. The Flash viewer seems to crash a lot though (or at least in Chrome) -- still a great pano. I wonder how it was done -- from a helicopter no doubt but beyond it would be a mystery.
- Brian Sullivan
I just tried it in Chrome and recommend Firefox instead. It didn't crash on me in Chrome, but it didn't run smoothly either.
- Michael Fidler
Brian, I would love to know how these are made. I know some are done from a helicopter, but if you check out the one from Downtown, it's clearly stationary. I can't even see the reflection of the camera in the building windows when it's turned around 180 degrees. I've posted links to others above. I wonder if I should repost this to a room and if so which one?
- Michael Fidler
Here's the link for Sydney http://bit.ly/aFFbZ and I'll grab a few more.
- Michael Fidler
I know generally how to make these 360 panos but the only technique I know is shooting from a tripod where you have control of the leveling of the camera and control of the angle of shooting. You have to manipulate out the tripod out of the picture after shooting -- these I have no idea, http://radio.weblogs.com/0127028... is a QTVR one of my living room
- Brian Sullivan
All the fisheye does is cut down on the number of shots you need to take -- if it goes 180 in both directions two shots are nominally sufficient on a full frame camera - usually 3 though but that is only if all are shot with the same horizon and with precise angular placement. How you control this in a moving helicopter is beyond me. Maybe more than one camera ? In shots like these where parallax is less of a problem maybe that is the method used
- Brian Sullivan
This must be shot completely differently than a stationary panoramic. I'm familiar with the 8 shot method, but the camera needs to be on a tripod as Brian mentioned. If you watch these images load slowly, they look like plates. It sort of reminds me of photosynth, but connected somehow. Now, I really want to find out how it's done.
- Michael Fidler
I think regular stationary panoramas are loaded as "plates" (at least you export them that way to edit them) as well so I am not sure that is a clue as to how they were generated.
- Brian Sullivan
If I email them, do you think they'll answer? Hi, I was just curious; what’s your secret? You never know. It might be worth a try:)
- Michael Fidler
Here's one of U2 (on one of their smaller tours), and I don't think they had a helicopter with them to shoot it. http://www.pixelcase.com.au/vr...
- Michael Fidler
That one is done from a tripod or monopod of some type it appears -- you can see if you look down the footprint has the logo on it.
- Brian Sullivan
Ya, I noticed one that had the logo above it. May they use it when photoshop doesn't do the job perfectly.
- Michael Fidler
Logos like that are used to hide the footprint of the tripod or other -- sometimes it can be a lot of work create a shot to cover the spot (or to fill it in using a bitmap editor) so it is just masked.
- Brian Sullivan
OK, check out this one http://www.pixelcase.com.au/vr... and go into planet view. It's the P next to the directional controls. I wonder if that has something to do with it. Shot off a reflective globe maybe.
- Michael Fidler
Michael: So you like "Little Planets"? :) http://www.flickr.com/search...
- Holger Eilhard
The "P" gets you the "polar view" -- a standard view that can be created from any 360/180 panorama so that is not a clue as to how it is done either from what I can determine (http://www.flickr.com/groups... is a flickr group dedicated to such polar views)
- Brian Sullivan
I've seen them many times before and wondered how they were made, too. This guy has some examples and apparently he uses a 10.5mm lens and then maps them into shape: http://www.flickr.com/photos...
- Michael Fidler
STUPENDO! Io ci torno il 18 Settembre
- PICCHU
Yes the 10.5 is a Nikon fisheye lens -- I use a Peleng 8mm fully manual fisheye -- more suited to my budget. When shooting with tripod you need a parallax correction jig as well -- I use the Nodal Ninja -- which is a reasonable quality low end device.
- Brian Sullivan
I was on the Hugin site a few months ago and I found a video that demonstrates how to use the jig. It didn't mention helicopter shots though. In fact, the video was very particular about not having any movement. I think it's time to ask them.
- Michael Fidler
Yeah I have seen a number of these panoramas that seem to defy logic. Peter Murphy (who is a pioneer in this type of stuff) has a number of puzzling ones - http://www.mediavr.com/manlyai... (needs Quick time) for example. His weblog has tons of others as well _http://www.mediavr.com/blog/
- Brian Sullivan
@briansullivan I went to an event last night where I came across something that might explain how these are done. If you check out the picture I shot of the equipment; it uses a reflective dome to capture the entire shot all at once and then processes it almost instantly afterwards. http://bit.ly/qD0dn . It basically comes out looking like a globe or a planet before it is processed. Once processed it look like a full panoramic just like the ones here, but in lower resolution.
- Michael Fidler
I haven’t seen the digital version yet, but the guy who owns this company told me they would be much sharper than the prints which they give out at the event. I also asked him about the helicopter shots, and he wasn’t sure about compensating for movement, but he didn’t see it as a big problem either. Mystery solved?
- Michael Fidler
I don't see this lens/device as "the" answer. Other similar devices have a reputation for low optical quality and low resolution. Peter Murphy almost certainly does not use such a lens. No serious panorama photographer that I have heard of uses anything like this.
- Brian Sullivan
I guess the search for an answer continues...
- Michael Fidler
Hi - I own Pixelcase and shot the tour of Sydney aswell as all development. Glad you like my work.
- pixelcase
Thank you, I'm glad you found this. I love your work. Based on the number of likes and comments for this post, I think it’s safe to say, I’m not the only one. It would be nice if you could enlighten us with some details about how these are made.
- Michael Fidler
Here's a link to pixelcase's newest and IMHO best work of Melbourne http://ff.im/eBJZn
- Michael Fidler
Outstanding -- still no resolution on how it is done -- but I guess there is no reason why he should spill all his trade secrets.
- Brian Sullivan
Brian - No answer, and I can't blame him for wanting to keep it a secret. I guess that we have to just appreciate it for what it is. However, I'm already looking forward to whatever he does next!
- Michael Fidler
Poking around in panorama forums -the consensus seems to be that the pictures for these panoramas are shot with a multi-camera set up attached to an RC helicopter. The viewer is krpano - http://www.krpano.com/
- Brian Sullivan
???? :) http://johncolebrook.com/compone... - enjoy
- pixelcase
http://friendfeed.com/briansu... a helicopter like this would do the job
- Brian Sullivan
John, thanks for sharing. Love it! Brian; I've always wanted a RC helicopter, but I still haven't gotten around to buying one yet. However, the picture from the one in the video is great.
- Michael Fidler
FYI rosauro - the helicopter guy is also a well known VR/panorama photographer (also from Toronto where I am ) http://www.rosaurophotography.com/
- Brian Sullivan
Ugh. The incorrect perspective caused by stretching the picture on the sides makes me queasy.
- Otto
Otto, maybe Dramamine would help:)
- Michael Fidler
Brad Williamson to Brad's feed, Media News and Analysis, Funny Pics and Videos, Funny Funny, TV Talk
"Keep Fucking That Chicken": Ernie Anastos, News Anchor, Curses On Air (VIDEO) --- Say hello to the new phrase that's sure to sweep the nation! - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009...
blackChinahand, Jimminy, CoG of FF, Diego | GreatSmurf and 32 other people liked this
"Legendary New York broadcaster Ernie Anastos had a momentary lapse of reason Wednesday night when he dropped the F-bomb live on TV. During some playful banter with local weatherman Nick Gregory, Anastos complimented Gregory, or at least attempted to, by saying, "It takes a tough man to make a tender forecast, Nick." Looking confused, Gregory responded, "I guess that's me." Without missing a beat, Anastos continued, "Keep fucking that chicken," a completely bewildering phrase that made co-anchor Dari Alexander's eyes bug out of her head. Gregory, for his part, just threw his hands up and shook his head."
- Brad Williamson
from Bookmarklet
This guy has no idea how famous he's about to become on the IntraWebz
- Brad Williamson
Finally something sensible from Fox *LOL*
- Rene, Pro Button Pusher
HAHAHAH
- bora "head" basman
Why is this a "video tape" of a screen and audio from the speakers? Just seem odd to me, is this how someone "records" their TV programs?
- Stephen Christian
ROFL
- Vicarbott
I swear, it feels like that guy belongs in an episode of Family Guy. If this vid become viral enough, I'm sure he'll make a cameo on there.
- Brad Williamson
WOW!...What does that even mean?
- LLnL
I DON'T KNOW!!! THAT'S WHY IT'S BRILLIANT!!!
- Brad Williamson
Did he just say what I think he said??? EPIC!!!
- Stephanie Segel
He meant to say plucking chicken
- Monique
indeed.. i wonder when i'll be seeing this in a motivational poster?
- ed fry
this was totally awesome, thanks for bumping lol
- bora "head" basman
Great phrase, but I think he said, "plucking."
- Laura Norvig
from iPod
President Obama to deliver State of the Union on January 27 - http://wireupdate.com/wires...
dkb liked this
Silhouetted Sculler (via Fulla T) - http://emmeffe.tumblr.com/post...
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Michael Fidler and dkb liked this
Ruta Del Vino (tone mapping) (via Luis Vásquez (.Luis3D ぼけ)) - http://emmeffe.tumblr.com/post...
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Iván Abrego, Chris Bellinger, dkb and zephyrlily liked this
The Problem With LED Traffic Lights: They Can't Melt Snow - http://autos.aol.com/article...
buzbadem, Toby Graham, Tony Ruscoe and 15 other people liked this
"Cities around the country that have installed energy-efficient traffic lights are discovering a hazardous downside: The bulbs don't burn hot enough to melt snow and can become crusted over in a storm — a problem blamed for dozens of accidents and at least one death."
- James Ferguson
from Bookmarklet
One would think weather considerations would be a part of a design like that.
- Mark Trapp
Nonsense! Bottom line wins!
- James Ferguson
price and cost of operation tend to be the main things cities look at.
- Joe The Sausage
they speak the truth. unintended consequences and all that.
- Georgie Bestie
Or an honest mistake?
- dkb
not likely.
- Joe The Sausage
no, i think it probably was. i doubt they even considered it.
- Georgie Bestie
OMG. Will there ever be any to people trying to shut down new, better, smarter, more efficient technology as it develops? It's not like "Industry" does much forward-thinking-things-through these days, anyway. No one bitches as much about anti-depressant pharmaceuticals that cause teenagers to want to kill themselves.
- ɐ ɯıʞ sıɹɥɔ
are you sure about that?
- Joe The Sausage
okay, I probably overstated that. But how/why do we let that happen? More importantly, what are other options that can be assistive rather than critical?
- ɐ ɯıʞ sıɹɥɔ
THE SOURCE OF THE DEFICIT MESS.... Republican lawmakers and far-right activists have suddenly discovered, after eight years of dramatic fiscal irresponsibility, that they care deeply about deficit reduction again. Worse, they're absolutely convinced that President Obama and those free-spending Democrats are responsible, putting a terrible burden... - http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archive...
dkb, rowlikeagirl and maxilprof liked this
"Some critics charge that the new policies pursued by President Obama and the 111th Congress generated the huge federal budget deficits that the nation now faces. In fact, the tax cuts enacted under President George W. Bush, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, and the economic downturn together explain virtually the entire deficit over the next ten years."
- Russellreno
from Bookmarklet
always money for war bullets and bombs and massive tax cvuts for the rich never quite enough money to cover programs for actual taxpayers
- WarLord
Exactly. WarLord++
- Andrew C (✓)
San Francisco, The Worst-Run Big City in the U.S. - http://www.sfweekly.com/2009-12...
"Serhat Ozan", Tyson Key, Chris Brinkerhoff and 12 other people liked this
"Accordingly, millions of taxpayer dollars are wasted on good ideas that fail for stupid reasons, and stupid ideas that fail for good reasons, and hardly anyone is taken to task. The intrusion of politics into government pushes the city to enter long-term labor contracts it obviously can't afford, and no one is held accountable. A belief that good intentions matter more than results leads to inordinate amounts of government responsibility being shunted to nonprofits whose only documented achievement is to lobby the city for money. Meanwhile, piles of reports on how to remedy these problems go unread. There's no outrage, and nobody is disciplined, so things don't get fixed. San Francisco is the city that simply will not hold itself accountable."
- Paul Buchheit
from Bookmarklet
Apparently good intentions alone do not form the basis for good government.
- Paul Buchheit
It can't be worse run than Los Angeles. I refuse to believe that! It seems SF non-profits = LA corporate/developer dudes.
- Anika
At least SF has a public transit system that can nearly be relied upon!
- ɐ ɯıʞ sıɹɥɔ
I guess they should start flattening it - first ..
- Catalin Popescu
I would imagine it is not worse than New Orleans. New Orleans has long been known as one of the most corrupt cities in the country.
- Robert Felty
I love Raleigh - The Best-Run Small City in the US :-)
- Shakeel Mahate
I was just saying to a friend on the ferry last night that it won't be the Next Big Earthquake that destroys San Francisco, since it's pretty much self-destructing. It's horrifying and sad to watch.
- vicster
Studio Ghibli Next Film is Inspired by "The Borrowers" #anime - http://punchdrunkcritics.blogspot.com/2009...
Tinfoil 2.0, John Wang, Nicķ and 5 other people liked this
"At a press conference, Ghibli produce Toshio Suzuki said what the story was about. ''This is a story of a girl who borrows many things from the human's world for her life. I think the film will give viewers suggestions about how to survive this tough time,'' Suzuki said. The movie is set to be released summer 2010."
- Shevonne
from Bookmarklet
Night life (via MarcelGermain) - http://emmeffe.tumblr.com/post...
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A. T., dkb, HollyHobby and Iván Abrego liked this
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