Now you're just getting lazy with your scripts!
- Mike Nayyar
Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in...
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- Tinfoil 2.0
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.
- Tinfoil 2.0
So it's since Tuesday huh? The ultimate thread. How will the thread die then? We must have a limit for that, let's say 24h without one comment.
- Zu from AOD
As a side note, I do have to applaud the endurance and pettiness of those of us on FriendFeed. No one on Facebook gave this status update a second look!
- Mike Nayyar
We pride ourselves in our pettiness and obsessiveness. Um, wait.
- Tinfoil 2.0
Remember. It's not whole Scoble likes. It's who likes Scoble.
- Akiva
According to FriendFeed, that's everyone. And some Twitter marketers and SEO experts.
- Mike Nayyar
Mike will get in the last word. Eventually. Everyone else is an idiot for playing his little game. Me included. :-)
- Robert Scoble
I'm not actually playing. Or, if I am, I'm playing to lose.
- Akiva
HAHA! You see that? Robert Scoble acknowledges I will eventually win! HAHA! FINALLY! For once in my life, I win! :) :) :) :) Unless Logical shows up...
- Mike Nayyar
Only mostly dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.
- Tinfoil 2.0
We're testing the limit on the number of comments.
- DGentry
Nah, the FFundercats live chat pushed that one way over the top. We are, however, testing the limits oh how sick people are getting of setting my face.
- Mike Nayyar
This thread has a lot of comments, that must mean Mike is an expert of some kind...or maybe an A-Lister. Must stalk^H^H^H^H^Hinvestigate him...
- Rah-PM 2012
Olympus too? Good thing Logical doesn't know any Japanese mythological figures.
- Mike Nayyar
All right, if you're going to play that way, Raijin AND Ajisukitakahikone are BOTH mad at you. And Raijin was especially unhappy because you interrupted his NOMmage of children's bellybuttons.
- Tinfoil 2.0
Dude, my best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Raijin put down the platter.
- Tinfoil 2.0
We'd be content, of course, if you (Mike) issued a public retraction of the assertion in your post, followed by allowing someone else to post the last comment in the thread ;-)
- Tinfoil 2.0
805 comments!! I'm afraid to click on the more link....
- Jeff P. Henderson
Nicholas, as long as it's not Mike, it's irrelevant.
- Tinfoil 2.0
I'm sad that Logical saw this Facebook status.
- Mike Nayyar
You know at some point, expanding this comment will really put a strain on mortal browsers. It already has a 3 second pause to expand it.
- Mark Philpot
I wonder if at some point we will hit a soft limit and FF won't let it keep going. That or they look at this as a great high-bounds test case for the system.
- Sparky, lurking
Great experiment there, I'm somewhat scared opening the thread here. Funny thing, Even the explosion of words spawned through this, making it a wordle madness. http://www.wordle.net/gallery...
- Zu from AOD
I'm scared to expand the comment thread :)
- Roberto Bonini
There are few computers with the processing power capable of handling the comments in this thread. Except for, you know, quantum computers.
- Mike Nayyar
from iPhone
i'm afraid to click on the link to see all comments. so i'm just typing this so another guy (or gal) can read it and comment to make this comment disappear.
- Alfredo 亜瑠布れっど
If anyone gets these emails in their gmail and got sick and tired of them like me, just press 'm' to mute the conversation (if you have keyboard shortcuts enabled) (haha i got the last word)
- Daniel Morgan
No you just don't know I posted this.
- John D Reasor
cant the person that started this block the comments now? and thereby win.
- Morgan
If you can get buddy buddy with mike and figure out his schedule, you can prevent him from stopping the comments because you'll always be able to get the last word in. We must prevail for great justice!
- Jonathan Hardesty
That would be cheating, and he knows it :)
- Tinfoil 2.0
That's how the FriendFeed Mob rolls. :-D
- Steven Perez
from IM
you didn't disable the comments yet? you could comment and then do it and then you really would get the last word. but then again, that's cheating. and cheaters never prosper.
- Trish Haley
You're not supposed to make sense of it. It exits only as an opaque, monolithic data structure that is constantly being updated and evolving. ;)
- Tyson Key
Attempting to parse it in a manner that is not approved by FriendFeed, Inc may result in disruption of the space-time continuum, and a series of Bad Things(R) occurring.
- Tyson Key
not only does it make julian fries, but it slices and dices in in seconds. ORDER NOW and you'll get this special gift ABSOLUTELY FREE!!!!!!11!!1ONE!
- guruvan (Rob Nelson)
from email
this is the thread that doesn't end, yes it goes on and on my friend, Mike started it not knowing what it was, and it'll keep on going no matter what just because this is the thread that doesn't end, yes it goes on and on my friend, Mike started it.....
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
from IM
welcome back my friends, to the thread that never ends, we're so glad you could attend, step inside, step inside.
- Mike Nencetti
MISSILES FOR ALL! Gun control is for unarmed wussies! Blow away comment limits! Damn the torpedoes! FULL STEAM AHEAD!!!
- guruvan (Rob Nelson)
from email
Test conducted to see how long this can last.
- Ashish
it'll never die, with all the wireless cards out there transmitting this, it'll reach alpha centuari in about 300 years.
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
from IM
It's not because I'm a person who wants to have the last word, but just because you people keep me reminding that there are others that do want that very badly, that causes me to comment here once again. HI! I'M BETTER THAN MIKE NAYYAR!!!!!!! LOSER! :-)
- Ton Zijp
This IS the time and place to announce a gathering of the societal beginnings of the intrepid adventures of... Wait... sorry, this isn't the place? Oh, okay, I'll go back home then.
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
I was able to expand this thread on my Droid incredible, and post this comment at the end. Nice test of Dolphin HD browser.(edit - I use the default FF web page.)
- Mike Nencetti
from Android
If I get the last word in, will I get .LAG's World Series tix???
- Lisa L. Seifert | FHG™
It's been a while, Mr. LastWordThreat. I did some good things these recent months. Care to share some of your insights while you were on that trip? TLDR. 8) (2K+ comments is massive hehe, we're getting to your second b-day)
- Zu from AOD
All I want for Christmas are my two front teef.
- Mike Nayyar
Eventually, you will win. Because you're not married to this thread. But if you ever marry...your trend of always getting the last word will end. Painfully.
- Bubba Botts
This thread must go away!!! What if it kills FF!?
- SAM
this thread could go away right now. but you people keep posting comments...wait....didn't I just do the same thing? OK, nevermind. Long live this Thread!!!!
- Morgan
I heard Nayyar had to get in the The Last Word, always. I talked to the casting director, and Mike Nayyar got the lead in The Last Word.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
this is the last one -------------->>> WORD!
- .LAG liked that
Every middle brings another middle. When the world ends, will this comment be toward the end of the thread, or toward the beginning?
- John E. Bredehoft
You guys!!! This post will forever break FF if we're not careful.
- SAM
Yeah, we should all totally stop bumping this post.
- Slippy
I'm surprised Friendfeed can still expand this thread.
- Morton Fox
OMG, doesn't even want to image what would happen if Nayyar tried to use #fftop20. Actually I kind of do, but I bet it would be slow. Scores would be off the charts though.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
Probably still under 9000, people should try harder.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
This is my rifle. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My rifle is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my rifle is useless. Without my rifle I am useless. I must fire my rifle true. I must shoot straighter than my enemy, who is trying to kill me. I must shoot him before he shoots me. I will. Before God I swear this creed: my...
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- Tyler (Chacha)
I received three submissions via Twitter from @redstickrant (Clifford): ""Never get involved in a land war in Asia." "Why, yes, I do want fries with that..." "History is made at night. Character is what you are in the dark."
- John E. Bredehoft
Another word and the forces will abolish all forms of Cilantro on this planet called Earth, message received from Planet Janet
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
Message to Planet Janet: you know you love it with cilantro, baby.
- Steven Perez
Now see this is the interesting thing: if anybody posts, then you have to. So if everybody keeps posting, you'll just have to keep up with us. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
- caj needs a haircut
Debating tip: never try to get in the last word. Always give your opponent the opportunity to get in the last word. By some sort of mysterious karmic law, your persuasiveness will improve immeasurably. :)
- Sean McBride
Steven Perez isn't a Bunneh!!! As long as he doesn't respond.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
So... it's kind of like a "tontine" but with a pretty weak payoff?
- Mark J
It's okay, he's got a Catch-22 now. Steven Perez isn't a Bunneh, so long as he doesn't respond. And we all know he refutes his Bunneh status.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
It was real hawt in the town that night! IF I EDIT 18 hours later like now - is your last still last if comments are disabled? A hawt question.
- Steve Cleary
Steven is a Bunneh!!! He responded when I said he wasn't. Bunneh's can win if they want.
- Jimminy, CoG of FF
You did see where I said that I like my food scared and running, yeah? Mmmmm, ferret-ka-bobs ...
- Steven Perez
from IM
I do indeed see where this is headed, and no sir, I don't like it. *calls upon the forces of Voltron
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
from IM
Sadly, the only Voltron to heed your call is the vehicle Voltron. And I disabled that yo-yo by pulling out the sparks plugs in the car feet.
- Steven Perez
from IM
It's an old Navajo word for "punk-ass bitch".
- Steven Perez
from IM
No one has the slightest idea how much Steven is enjoying this...
- Abhishek
very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy very busy
- Steven Perez
from IM
VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY
- Steven Perez
from IM
hmm... 800+ comments on this thread, and this is my first, and probably last comment on this thread. I wonder should I read all the comments, or just post?
- Mike Nencetti
Are you guys still trying to win?
- Steven Perez
from IM
23 years from now, Steven will still check his MSGoogle MyFriendFace feed every morning so he can respond to this post with 3,137,783 comments...
- Just Joe
from iPod
After half a month there must have been moment you thought it would not be a real big deal if you eventually should NOT have the last word, I suppose?
- Ruud van Wijngaarden
Now that you've nearly reached 1100 comments, I realized that I hadn't officially "liked" this yet! Error rectified, though you're clearly a comment whore, you show great panache while doing so!
- Mark J
Ohhh, you mean that place, which is totally faked by a #viciousbunneh who was in cahoots with the government in taking all the alfalfa plants into an underground hidden bunker.
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
Now that I have achieved status of half-centurian, I request the next 50 days of last word in honor of my achievement of breathing.
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
Well, well, well. Has it been 50 days already?
- Steven Perez
I will allow you to have the last word. But to take that last word you are surrendering your honor to a den of sightless whores.
- ‘-.-’ Tutivillus Grift
It was a test. Honor is pride. A den of sightless whores is merely an event that you will carry forever. You have attained the 7th level of enlightenment.
- ‘-.-’ Tutivillus Grift
Considering that this thread has only been around since August, and has been shut down for the last two months, that's not too bad.
- Steven Perez
from IM
2012 is just the begining of the 13th Baktun, the long cont calendar doesn't actually run out until sometimes after 4772, that is of course if you stick with only Baktuns and don't use the other 4 higher counts, I just think FF will end in 4217 on planet Tersanzar :)
- T-Bone Tsali, FF Cherokee
Ah, right thread. In that thread, it's asked what you think you smell like. In this thread, I told you what I think you smell like.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Cilantro, Strawberries, and Chilaquiles.
- Steven Perez
I think this has lasted long enough. We already know what has to be the last word, it's already in the original quote. I will put it as the closing comment. I think we will all feel relieved we can now carry on to do greater things. For ourselves, our loved ones and the world.
- Ruud van Wijngaarden
I dunno, the Akiva nipple-licking beach picture is pretty long, too. :-) Ah, and it looks like Mike Nayyar's last-word thread has more than 2200 comments in it. I guess we'll have to step it up over here, huh?
- Ladyepiphanybug
One minute in, and we begin with a small, defenseless animal being eviscerated off-screen. Yep, this is going to be chock full of romance.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Wait, she's gonna miss the heat of Phoenix?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
Forks?!? The town is named Forks?!? In a vampire movie?!?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
5:15 - Adults using slang. My brain hurts already.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Eternal youth at his command, and his first conversational gambit is about the weather?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
*wondering if the microscope is supposed to be some kind of phallic symbol*
- Steven Perez
from IM
*pout pout* I'm a emo girl with permanent worried eyebrows. My lab partner is really hot but looks really pale and he can stop suvs with his hand. *pout pout*
- Josh Haley
Yep, definitely a phallic symbol.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Did these kids go to the Anakin Skywalker School of Not Really Emoting?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
"Did your eyes just change?" "Errrrrrr ..." *runs away*
- Steven Perez
from IM
21:15 - "OMG I'M IN LOVE WITH SUPERBOY!!!"
- Steven Perez
from IM
And he totally saved her truck, too. What a dreamboat.
- Steven Perez
from IM
And here comes smarmy vampire doctor. Must have been an off-week on the soaps.
- Steven Perez
from IM
"Your vitals look good. Mind if I check by biting your neck and draining your blood?"
- Steven Perez
from IM
Wow. Mopey and a bad liar. He's definitely the hero.
- Steven Perez
from IM
25 minutes in, and I'm wondering when Blade is going to show up and start offing the cast.
- Steven Perez
from IM
OK, I need a brain break from all this emotional turmoil. Back in ten.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Ah, the things you guys miss when I go make me some tea. I came up with this awesome alternate timeline where Blade and Buffy show up and start killing off the town, just like AVP2. Actually, that movie sucked worse, but hey, I'm only half an hour into TWILIGHT. C'mon, mopey emo kids, don't let me down!!! Suck harder than AVP2!!!
- Steven Perez
from IM
aaaaaaaand, picking it up from the hospital ...
- Steven Perez
from IM
In the greenhouse now. They're having a fight. I think. I can't tell cuz they still have the same expressions on their faces all the time.
- Steven Perez
from IM
I can't wait until you get to the "THIS IS THE SKIN OF A MONSTER!" scene. :D It's my favorite.
- Hookuh Tinypants
Seriously, so far, this is the slowest vampire movie I've ever seen. And that includes the 1931 version of DRACULA.
- Steven Perez
from IM
This may save me from having to watch the movie.
- Just Katie
I'm beginning to wonder if I accidentally got a SMALLVILLE episode by mistake ... oh, wait, there's the Superman reference.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Don't feel bad, the books move even MORE slowly. Honestly, someone needs to buy Stephenie Meyer some classes on pacing and plot-building.
- Hookuh Tinypants
It is slow until, for just a few minutes, it's not. Then it's over. The visuals were pretty neat, though, and I enjoyed the music. Definitely wasn't worth $22.99 for a two-disc set.
- Ladyepiphanybug
Holy cow. I'm starting to feel that dull buzzing that indicates brain damage. Usually happens when I find myself watching some teen soap opera by mistake.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Heather: soooooooo, ... you're telling me that the one fight scene from the trailer is pretty much all the action?!? Cuz if that's true, I'm gonna reach for the KILL BILL set and review that instead. :D
- Steven Perez
from IM
Erin: It was the booze! I swear!!! :D
- Steven Perez
from IM
35:00 - FINALLY! Creepy stalker guy (I think) buys it - off-screen. WTF?!? Did Nickelodeon fund this movie?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
I just watched the movie earlier today. I could have saved myself 2 hours and some change by just waiting and reading this. Oh well, live and learn. :)
- Jason Shultz
from twhirl
O. M. G. They're trying on dresses?!? Did I pick up the E! network by mistake?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
Of course, the local tribe knows all about the vampires. Duh. Why do you think there are no vampires in Native American lore? CUZ THEY KILLED THEM ALL.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Lessee: doesn't like sunlight, eyes change colors, mopey whiney emo mood swings, lousy driver, ... and now telepathy. It's so obvious. Mopey Dude is a mutant. He probably blew in from the Xavier School.
- Steven Perez
from IM
(Wait ... books?!? Plural?!?!?!?)
- Steven Perez
from IM
(Four of 'em, and a fifth online somewhere.)
- Ladyepiphanybug
GEEZ! FINALLY! Almost an hour into the film and she finally figures it out. She's a regular Lois Lane, this one.
- Steven Perez
from IM
(FOUR?!? Are they plotted as slowly as this movie?!?)
- Steven Perez
from IM
OK, pop quiz: you've just found out that the dreamy mope in your class is a vampire. Do you (a) stock up on silver and garlic and wait to ambush him and his clan or (b) go off into the woods to interrogate him all alone? If you chose (b), then this movie is for you!
- Steven Perez
from IM
Wait, so now he's a sparkly unicorn?!?
- Steven Perez
from IM
He's the world's most dangerous predator?!? Now I wish that an actual Predator would show up and school his mopey ass.
- Steven Perez
from IM
OK, that's it. I give up. No mas.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Seriously, this movie hurt my brain. The dialogue must have been written by the same 7th-grade lunch table thespians that George Lucas used to write the "romantic" scenes in ATTACK OF THE CLONES. I wasn't expecting anything Whedonesque, but geez, watching this movie was like watching a CW teen drama on Ritalin.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Oy. I'm gonna go crack open that bottle of 120 proof vodka and watch a pre-1999 John Woo movie to cleanse the palate. Congratulations, LET THE RIGHT ONE IN; you're still the best vampire movie from the last 18 months.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Oh, and Leather Donut? You were right, dude: ASS.
- Steven Perez
from IM
You really reviewed this? Give me another Shiner Bock...
- Joel Robert Perez
As you can see, I only made it half-way through, but that's because I couldn't breathe because I was laughing too much. :D
- Steven Perez
Yep...that baseball scene was.......was.........WAS...................KKKKKKKHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!
- Joel Robert Perez
I am so copying this down for posterity once they burn this joint down. :) This is the thread that kicked off the Tex-Mex Movie Reviews with Haggis.
- Steven Perez
This is a great idea >> you should hold weekly movie reviews :P
- Angelo Rodrigues
I TOTALLY SHOULD! Maybe I can find someone to do them with me! :D
- Steven Perez
Every time a new Twilight movie comes out, I get the urge to finish the review. Then I sober up.
- Steven Perez
This is the most awesome thing I have seen in a long, long time.
- Michael McKean
I was going to put a bandolier on the bunneh and have it say "VIVA LA REVOLUCION!!" but the bunneh was too small. Seriously, though: that bunneh with the carrot bandolier from the PETA ad? PURE WIN.
- FFing Enigma
I have got to learn photoshop.....I have some pretty cool ideas....
- Joel Robert Perez
Oh, Tina, does that mean I need to record my FooFoo video? :-D Also, madam, you are FULL OF WIN!!!
- Ladyepiphanybug
Down came the Good Fairy, and she said: Liittle Bunneh Steven, I don't want to see you, scoopin' up the field mice and boppin' 'em on the head.
- Katy S
I know, but it's better than nothing...especially in HD!
- .LAG liked that
We had arena league season ticks but that folded. So nothing.
- Todd Hoff
@Todd...oh, yeah, that's right, I forgot about arena football going on hiatus for at least one season. is nothing sacred in this economy?
- .LAG liked that
Northing. We are on the border of the profane.
- Todd Hoff
I agree with Steven, not the same. Sorry tho Mr Perez, GO PACKERS!!
- Shey
This has to be the best friendfeed face ever. I feel sorry for you, Shey, but hey on the bright side, Formula One is about to kick off again soon.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
My husband sports that same face every year too. Epic photo Shey! :D
- Carmen wBabby
...as fresh as the first time you posted it! .LOLz! -- btw, at least there's the scouting combines this week on NFL Network... if you like watching a bunch of college football players run around cones.
- .LAG liked that
For some reason, I read combines as concubines. I've been reading the Bible a lot more lately, LOL.
- Shey
hahaha!..... for some of those players, there will be concubines (and transgressions) too...
- .LAG liked that
dude... EPL, Serie A, La Liga, and Champion's League are going strong, and MLS is just about to get rolling! TONS OF FOOTBALL!!!
- Bren
I like it. Give me a character, I will become her next time ... :)
- Penny
My dad once told a telemarketer that she'd caught him on the way to the bathroom to take a shit and read the paper. She was so embarrassed, she stammered an apology and then hung up.
- Hookuh Tinypants
say something like i can't take the abuse!!! LOL
- Joel Robert Perez
Pretend to be Myrna, the alcoholic divorcee who's trying to make a love connection. :D
- Steven Perez
Hahahahah!! I like them all. Seeing as though some days I can get 10 calls a day from telemarketers, I will try them all :D
- Penny
one company wouldn't stop calling me even after asking several times, so i pretended i wanted to "order" and i read the first half of my credit card # and then "decided" to use a different card and read the first half of that number etc... i did this about a half-dozen times and had them waiting on the line for about 10 minutes while i kept pretending to fumble around looking for the...
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- Gus
tell them, you work for the CIA, and you know who you are and where they live. wait for the gasp.
- Joel Robert Perez
i've been known to use soundboards on them.
- Anthony Citrano
It's 12:23 in the morning, I've had five cups of coffee, I'm not even a little tired, and I think I've seriously lost my mind from the fatigue of only four hours of sleep in the last 36 hours. You know, I don't think I need pants.
Where no one agreed on anything. Even this was a point of serious debate.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
The evil Lord Perez had outlawed bunnehs throughout all of the Principality of FriendFeed.
- tehKenny
The kingdom was in peril (as all good kingdoms are).
- Paul W. Homer
One day, while out picking cilantro, Gunny decided he wanted some chicken and waffles.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Lord Perez asked: "But where shall we go to get the Chicken and Waffles?"
- tehKenny
Someone noticed that Gunny was picking cilantro and told him that cilantro is gross. Another person chided him that it's called coriander. A fight broke out.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
The fight quickly ended when the Wild Bunnehs of Helms Deep attacked.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Soon after the fight broke out, The town Scribe Sir Scobleizer posted about it on his blog.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
As the fight was not between two chicks no one cared to watch so Perez went back to his main focus and sent all his loyal minions to the magical land of Bacon in search of Chicken and Waffles.
- SteVe C
"AND BRING BACK SOME CILANTRO!" commanded the High Time Lord.
- Steven Perez
from IM
At that point someone stole the time lord's sonic screwdriver and made away with a great cackle...Twas the Master AKA Josh Haley.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
Meanwhile trouble was brewing in the land of Twitter. The citizens there were growing tired of having to speak only 140 letters at a time.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Suddenly a giant waffle Chicken showed up, brandishing a fierce clump of CILANTRO!
- Paul W. Homer
The evil Master Josh Haley ran all the way to the Land of Twitter, the Dread Lord's sonic screwdriver in tow, determined to break the 140-character limit with the Time Lord's technology, when he suddenly came upon the Giant Chicken of MySpace!
- Steven Perez
from IM
And a bunneh rabbit bearing the bomb that brother maynard carries with him.
- Martha
The Giant Chicken of Myspace was quite emaciated however, and was now only the size of a small cat. Josh Haley punted the Chicken in to outer space where it remains to this day.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
This all would have been reported on the internet, but sadly, RSS is dead.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Thankfully, the Chicken dropped his stachel of Magic Cilantro, which revived the RSS Feeds of Infotainment and powered the Great Chatter Machine.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Someone else chimed in to say that RSS is in fact not dead and that Dave Winer is quite proud of this fact, thank you very much.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
The Bunneh, however, dropped his bomb on that blabbermouth and went off with Master Haley to the Land of Twitter.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Unfortunately, the Corporate IT Nazis had set up a firewall blocking them from getting to Twitter.
- Scoble, Alex Scoble
As Master Haley and the bunneh pondered how to break the Firewall of Doom, the other subjects were still searching for the Chicken & Waffles Stronghold.
- Steven Perez
from IM
The small band of warriors in the lead of the search were comprised of Gunny the Brave, Alex the Scoble, Helen the Songbird, Katie the Oblivious and Shey the Sniper.
- Steven Perez
from IM
They were charged with crossing into the lands ruled by the Nomura, an army of young girls who insisted that everyone carry an iPhone.
- Steven Perez
from IM
If they could cross into those dangerous lands without being branded by the Force of i, then they would find sanctuary in the Kingdom of the Penguin, ruled by the beautiful and beneficient Princess Stripey Socks.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Little did the Nomuran's know, Gunny's Blackberry Curve had a camouflage function and they were able to cross their territory undetected.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
"Get rid of anything with the logo of the Window on it," said Gunny the Brave to his band, "If you carry anything like that into where we're going, the Nomura will find us and make us slaves in their Mac mines."
- Steven Perez
from IM
Quietly, the intrepid band crept across the glossy lands of the Nomura, keeping a sharp eye out for trouble.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Suddenly, there came a cry across the plain. "OMG YOU GUYS THEY'RE OVER THERE!" Zounds! One of the Nomura had found them!
- Steven Perez
from IM
Shey the Sniper tried to pick off the oncoming Nomura, but they moved too quickly from one place to another. Things looked grim.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Luckily the Nomurans were deathly afraid of bunnehs and kittehs, and the intrepid band of adventures were armed with them.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Suddenly, Helen the Songbird opened her mouth and let loose a burst of song at the Nomura. "NOOOO!" the Nomura said. "OPEN SOURCE MUSIC! WE CANNOT HANDLE OPEN SOURCE MUSIC ***AND*** BUNNEHS AND KITTEHS!!!"
- Steven Perez
from IM
Thus repelled, the Nomura retreated to their White Towers of Jobs, vowing revenge on the Time Lord's Children of Time.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Steve woke up, thinking "I have to stop reading LOTR and FF before I go to bed."
- anna sauce
Unfortunately, Steven was caught in a dream loop, brought on by a meal of bad lobster. Only the purest cilantro could break the loop.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Hopefully, his warriors would soon return with cilantro, and some chicken and waffles, and his sonic screwdriver.
- Steven Perez
from IM
As the warriors exited the land of the Nomura, they soon found themselves at Castle of the Flightless Queen, Princess Stripey Socks.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Standing guard at the gate was Sir Haggis, Captain of the Guard, who demanded a password from the group to gain entrance.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Alex the Scoble, who loved arguing with people, soon began an argument with Sir Haggis over whether or not passwords were legal in the Lands Beyond.
- Steven Perez
from IM
While Alex argued with Haggis, the rest of the group found the secret entrance and snuck inside.
- Steven Perez
from IM
At last Sir Haggis attempted to end the discussion by saying "You shall not pass," at which point the Scoble said simply, "Enigma" which, being the correct password, compelled Sir Haggis to open the door. He did so with an oath: "Oh, Ffing enigma!" he said.
- Vicarbott
Soon, the band of warriors were reunited and ushered before the most beautilful princess in the land, Princess Stripey Socks.
- Steven Perez
from IM
They looked up, each agape with wonder. The Princess smiled.
- Vicarbott
"Brave knights," the Princess said, resplendent in her finest rainbow gown and colorful striped socks, "take your rest tonight, and in the morning, I shall give you the map to the Fastness of Porcine Foodstuffs, where you may find what you seek."
- Steven Perez
from IM
The knights were ushered into resplendent rooms where they could refresh themselves before the feast that night.
- Steven Perez
from IM
After some rest and a wonderful feast, the Princess begged the knights to play a song for her.
- Steven Perez
from IM
And the cheers from the assembled throng were many and happy, as the band finished their song.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Suddenly, from outside the palace, came a hue and cry. OH NOES! The song had attracted the attention of the Wild Bunnehs! They were assaulting the castle!
- Steven Perez
from IM
"O NOES!" cried Princess Stripey Socks. "How will we repel the Wild Bunnehs? I need a True Hero to save my palace!"
- Ladyepiphanybug
Alas, Sir Haggis had disappeared beneath the onslaught of bunnehs.
- Ladyepiphanybug
And the Princess didst sing from the turret at the northwest corner of her fastness, "I need a hero! I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night!"
- Vicarbott
Suddenly, the Lord of Time appeared on a white steed, a bag of magic cilantro around his neck and all the armies of FriendFeed behind him, shouting a mighty war cry of "DEATH TO WILD BUNNEHS!"
- Steven Perez
The Wild Bunneh's unbeknownst to the Time Lord had developed the Carrot Hole. Head Wild Bunneh gave the command, "Lettuce commence our attack."
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
The Wild Bunnehs fired the Carrot Hole at the Time Lord in a great flash of light and sound, the scene going bright orange and smelly slightly of carrot bread.
- Steven Perez
from IM
The Time Lord was wallowing in a sea of cream cheese icing. The planned worked, Roger Bunneh made five carrot general, he was hailed a hero.
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
Ah, but the clever Time Lord was also a Kwitzach Haderach, and so called forth the rains to wash away the icing trap, while at the same time sweeping aside the Bunneh Army.
- Steven Perez
from IM
AHEM. NOT THE END. THIS ENDS WHEN I SAY IT ENDS.
- Steven Perez
from IM
NOW THEN, WHERE WERE WE? Right: So, having vanquished the Wild Bunnehs to a pocket dimension outside the Time Stream, Steven addressed his merry band of explorers, admonishing them, "Now don't forget: chicken, waffles, cilantro. And try to bring back some bacon, too. Here's some more money to help you on your trip."
- Steven Perez
Rescuing the brave Sir Haggis, Princess Stripey Socks charged him with joining the brave knights in the quest for good grub, giving a magic sword, enchanted shield, and a bag of holding containing a secret weapon.
- Steven Perez
The bag was moving, small sounds were heard. Sir Haggis was overjoyed when he glanced into this magical secret bag. A litter of babby bunneh cuteness could be seen.
- Janet-The Bottley Crue
The brave warriors woke early the next morning, refreshed from their stay at the Castle, and set off to the West to find the Bacon Stronghold.
- Steven Perez
Unbeknown to them a Elf was following them eating the Cilantro that was leaking from the bag.
- Kim Landwehr
The merry band made their way across the Enchanted Fields of Flightlessness, eventually reaching the borders of the A-List Bloggers' country.
- Steven Perez
Gunny the Brave said, "Now be careful not to get into any arguments here. The people love to argue even more than -".
- Steven Perez
from IM
He had not even finished the sentence before Alex the Scoble got into a heated debate with Michael the Errington, a well known brigand and fool, and Chris the White, a born argumentative goof. Soon, even the Songbird and the Oblivious were arguing with several well-known bloggers whether Twitter or Facebook was better.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Gunny, seeing that this matter would require no small amount of time to resolve, sat down to eat an early lunch: cilantro in a cilantro wrap with cilantro mayonnaise.
- Vicarbott
with a side of twisty fries seasoned with coriander.
- Vicarbott
Suddenly, inspired by the cilantro coursing through his veins, Gunny hit upon an idea; he whipped out his Blackberry and tweeted the following: "STEVE JOBS IS AT THE STARBUCKS AND IS TAKING QUESTIONS."
- Steven Perez
But there was no going away this day. No, Going away had been banished. The mighty over lord Steven had declared it to be so. Going away now had been replaced with
- Brent - Yes I am
singing! Gunny, with great relunctance, began to sing "We gotta get outta this place, if it's the last thing we ever do!"
- Vicarbott
Gunny finding quickly that his singing basically sucked and the curious onlookers were getting closer, decided that the Not Going away command declared by the Steve Overlord was in need of some serious fixing quickly. Gunny thought and thought and thought and came up with an Idea, a brilliant idea, and just as the Curious onlookers were just getting to curious for safety reasons, Gunny
- Brent - Yes I am
Picked up a lazer ray gun and cut all the curious on lookers in half. "That will teach you to mind your own business." shouted Gunny.
- Brent - Yes I am
Gunny began to wonder if perhaps he had been a little hasty.
- Kevin J Hatton
But it was too late. The soapy nasty evil cilantro had altered his mind, and history forever, so-
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Gunny decided that Cilantro was never going to pass his lips again.
- Brent - Yes I am
My lips are on file, Gunny said; as the cilantro was secretly dipped in acid.
- Joel Robert Perez
'Damn that's hot!' he exclaimed and began to ponder his next move.
- Kevin J Hatton
Suddenly Gunny realized that Steven shared part of his name with Perez Hilton, so..
- JazJaz
And that's when a large bucket of ice cold water drenched Gunny from head to toe; Haggis had saved him from some bad cilantro. Meanwhile, the A-List Bloggers, thrilled at the mention of Steve Jobs somewhere in the area, ran to the next Starbucks over, which just happened to be next door, allowing Gunny and Haggis to gather Helen, Katie, and Alex and make their escape, after they grabbed Gunny's secretly cloaked Blackberry.
- Steven Perez
The intrepid band of heroes knew that they would soon need supplies, as their cilantro had been tainted by the dreaded IMHO Virus, a known cilantro-killer in the land of A-List Bloggers; luckily, Katie, who was usually oblivious to such things, knew of a secret stash of cilantro, borracho beans, Spanish rice and flour tortillas, so they headed off to the Mexican Restaurant at the Edge of the Mountain.
- Steven Perez
Soon after sitting down, they realized that a cloaked figure in the corner had been watching them with great interest from the moment they entered the restaurant. The Scoble began to be anxious, "I know that cloak, Haggis" he whispered.
- Vicarbott
The cloaked figure, short and stout, made its way silently to the table, withdrawing its hood to display its large red mouth and row of sharp teeth, saying, "Greetings, fair travelers. I am Domo-Kun. I am here to lead you to our ruler, Princess Pea Awesomesauce, and she will grant you a boon for your trip. But first, finish your enchiladas before they get cold."
- Steven Perez
So the band of warriors had some yummy enchiladas and sopapillas, along with the finest tequila.
- Steven Perez
After their meal, Domo-Kun led the band to the edge of the mountain and said, "Now we must ride the wind. When I give the signal, we will jump off this cliff and be carried by the Rocs of Ages to the Stormhold of Pea. Get ready!"
- Steven Perez
From far away, a great raptor's cry echoed across the wide valley, soon joined by a chorus of calls that could have come from no ordinary birds.
- Steven Perez
"Sweet!" cried Gunny, through cilantro-colored teeth. "I've always wanted to be in a story like this!"
- Vicarbott
Katie handed Gunny a toothbrush and said, "Better hurry, cuz I think we're about to go flying."
- Steven Perez
At the rave, Gunny was given some cilantro laced with X. He passed out.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
Katie smacked Gunny awake. "Focus, man! The Rocs are coming. Finish brushing your teeth and get ready to jump!"
- Steven Perez
The flapping of wings became louder and louder as the Rocs, huge winged raptors from legends long since past, came into view, preparing to sweep the cliff and pick up their passengers on their journey to Domo-Kun's homeland.
- Steven Perez
But first the winged wonders ate at the base of the tree with all the dead bodies.
- Brent - Yes I am
"Stupid Rocs," growled Domo, "always getting distracted." He produced a bone whistle from his robes and let fly with a silent blast of noise. The Rocs looked up from their meal and flew towards the travelers on the cliff.
- Steven Perez
"OK," said Domo. "On my mark ... ready ... ready ... NOW!"
- Steven Perez
The group of warriors leapt from the cliff onto the backs of the swooping Rocs, all of them easily landing on the soft downy surface. The Rocs pierced the air with their battle cry and flew high into the air towards the Stormhold of Pea.
- Steven Perez
Gunny, with freshly brushed teeth looked around dazed and confused.
- Brent - Yes I am
Suddenly, there was a trembling and shuddering deep within the heart of the world, as the light blue of the Principality of FriendFeed changed to a darker, more evil hue.
- Steven Perez
OH NOES! The world around them had changed to resemble Teh Evil Kingdom of BookFaced!
- Steven Perez
"THIS WILL NOT STAND!" cried the Time Lord. "WE MUST SAVE THE KINGDOM BEFORE IT CRUMBLES INTO DUST! Or, at least, before stuff like search and posting files doesn't work anymore!"
- Steven Perez
Leaping from his throne, the Time Lord hurried to his lab, where his podcast partner, Time Lady Amber of Spence and her assistant, the lovely Lady Shevonne, were tinkering with a circuit board.
- Steven Perez
"Hark!" cried Lord Steven. "Time to get it in gear, you two. Fire up the TARDIS and let's go! We have to gather our forces and prepare for the assault!"
- Steven Perez
i was as bruised as the bloody Knife held in my hand " how was i going to be clever with the police walking up the stairs i just woke and there were dead animals around me it was a upmarket hotel in Barbados a dead horse a donkey bleeding and some other thing that are to disfigured too be identified how do i explain this "How procedurals , nok nok its the police yes just a moment as run...
more...
- Gratten
"Zounds!" said Lord Steven. "The time fractures are getting worse. Now other realities are beginning to bleed and merge into our own. We have to find the others quick so we can seal the breach and defeat the enemies of FriendFeed!"
- Steven Perez
Throwing up the chronal shields, the Time Lords and his companions streaked across the cosmos towards the Stronghold of Pea, hoping that the intrepid band of heroes mentioned way back when in the story were acquitting themselves with honor and dignity.
- Steven Perez
Making a brief stop at the Castle of the Flightless Queen to pick up Sir Haggis and Princess Stripey Socks ("No, you can't do drunken karaoke now! Yes, you can bring your PSYCH and SUPERNATURAL box sets with you! Yes, Sir Christian can come, too!"), the TARDIS made its way the Land of Domo-Kun ahead of the BookFaced Wave of Destruction.
- Steven Perez
The cat just stared at me. Now what?
- Steven Perez
from IM
Is it still there? How are you and it doing?
- Martha
Thankfully, the cat has relocated to a bedroom.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Phew. I am hosting a cat at my home overnight and I am very much fearing the potential negative consequences of my foolhardy assent to this course of action.
- Martha
Sandy is a follower.....so it will go wherever you will. That's Sandstorm for ya.
- Joel Robert Perez
A beta cat in an alpha world. Beary, my charge tonight, is a one year old who flies through the air with the greatest of ease leaving a wake of damage wherever he goes.
- Martha
Quit putting Kitty cat food in your Belly Button.
- Brent - Yes I am
Great. A follower. Guess that means another night of nearly squashing the cat.
- Steven Perez
from IM
Our charge has arrived. He almost jumped two floors, rather than using the stairs.
- Martha
The thing that gets me about this stuff isn't that these people can't spell... it's that their spelling reveals that they don't even know how to pronounce the words in the first place.
- Roger Benningfield
from BuddyFeed
Language Nazis almost always have questionable language skills. Funny, and sad.
- Kathy Fitch
For the record: surely you meant "not clear on the concept THAT FOLLOWS," rather than "concept of [a] feed." The very same people may very well be clear on the latter, though probably not one of the Friendly variety [http://google.com/search...]. And please don't tell us that all the others here knew exactly what you meant without the missing reference; none of us ever knows what you mean, but we've developed individual methods of dealing with that "nowledge" (and this one is a sample of mine).
- ianf ⌘
How strange that everyone except you knew what I was talking about. Res ipsa loquitur.
- Steven Perez
I speek english goodly. Speeking english is a rite and a responsability we shuld al take serious.
- G Dub of the Carolinas
my Nglish aint so swell, but i' fluent in valley & Pig Nglish, ;)
- chaz2b
everybody understands english if you speak it loudly and slowly enough.
- Imabug
Extremists are ugly. I'm not crazy about the sentiment, but I understand the emotion behind the knee-jerk reaction. When Chester's grandfather came to this country he may have spoken German, Polish, Lithuanian, Russian, perhaps a smattering of French and English. America didn't accommodate his family, why should it be so flexible for yours?
- Phil Boiarski
As one can plainly see, this is what happens when one substitutes logic and clear thinking for emotion.
- Steven Perez
Interestingly, I know some (generally non-crazy) people who believe that the US Govt, as well as states and localities, make intentional decisions to *prevent* Spanish-speakers from learning English. This keeps them in the lowest class, so that English-speakers don't get stuck with migrant farm working. From conducting school in Spanish, skipping ESL classes, to making sure govt offices...
more...
- Ladyepiphanybug
Phil - Actually, during the early part of the last century (during that huge wave of immigration from Eastern Europe), there were many "Americanization" programs aimed at those immigrant groups. Many were run by local civics groups and libraries, and some visited job sites to offer English instruction. The fear of immigrants ran high during that period, something eugenicists took advantage of.
- Katy S
An addition: One of the most famous racist anti-immigration texts from that period is Madison Grant's "The Passing of the Great Race, or The Racial Basis of European History." It's available on google books: http://books.google.com/books... I had the displeasure of reading it for my research. Unfortunately, it was very popular. This is the 1921 ed. The first ed. was in 1916.
- Katy S
uuuugh... Stuff like this just makes me angry, people should learn to accept, and stop being super christian bigoted halfwit in-bred fucks who think they own the world and are above everyone else...
- Greg/battou
So I'm guessing bad English is better then fluent anything? And these are the people that if they ever found themselves in France would complain to no end that the people there snubbed them for not speaking French.
- <3Heather<3
Kimber—and what made you think that an image that's apparently been imprinted in your brain would be that everywhere? There is a world outside the CNN… [@Heather: surely your last "French" is a misprint for "English"? Else it doesn't make sense].
- ianf ⌘
ianf - the "morans" picture has been going around the web for a couple of years now, and besides which, Steven posted that picture as well to the US politics room around the same time as this thread... Also, Heather's point is valid as originally formulated - she means that these "English should be the only language in the US" freaks really just mean "I only speak English" and would...
more...
- Andrew C (✓)
Andrew, perhaps you'd care to read with detached eye rather than misdirected emo before you attempt to correct my correct reading of Heather's misprint: "if they ever found themselves in France [they] would complain to no end that the people there snubbed them for not speaking French." Re: morans-picture, I can only repeat my earlier statement of a whole world outside the CNN and US-political navel-gazing.
- ianf ⌘
I am aware of all internet traditions.
- Andrew C (✓)
Also, I prefer my eyes the way they are - attached.
- Andrew C (✓)
OR, you could try asking the guy who posted this item what he meant.
- Steven Perez
from IM
I know some high school English teachers who would love that sign to just say, "English: Learn It". Though that changes the entire meaning, doesn't it?
- Miss Elle
Because here is what I meant: people who blather on about how English needs to be the official language of this country, yet can't be arsed to spell correctly on a piece of posterboard, need to STFU. They can take their decades-old thinly-veiled racist claptrap and stick it where the sun don't shine.
- Steven Perez
from Android
IMO If people are gonna bitch about something, they should at least spell it right! Damn!
- The Catz Meow
Post, Kimber added you as a friend on Goodreads. We need you to confirm that you are, in fact, friends with Kimber. To confirm this friend request, follow the below link: http://www.goodreads.com/friend... &utm_medium=email&utm_source=invite - Kimber (kimberscott.art@gmail.com)
- ♣ ♣ ♣
from email
Yep, Steven, and then they all get bunged up when the international view is that we're "all" ignoramuses. Yeesh - English is the "official language" of international business and it's embarrassing to me when people who are not native English speakers have better written grammar and diction than our American brothers & sisters. Bob the Angry Flower needs to address this.
- Prosey BUTTONS!
Leading in my count, so far - Love Ha3rvey's "Wanton libidinous trollop." Tied in second place: Johnny's "Barbra Streisand's Underpants" and - again! - Ha3rvey's "grape-brained milliwit."
- jan geronimo
Not bad LB. Greetings from San Marcos by the way...just south of ya.
- Joel Robert Perez
Thx, JRP. I had a great time and hope to make it back to Austin again. :)
- LB so u no it's real
Try the BBQ in Lockhart @ places like Kreutz's, Smitty's, or Chisolm Trail. Worth the trip. Lockhart is only 25 miles from the State Capitol just SE on Hwy 183.
- Joel Robert Perez
SMITTY'S is wonderful! so is Cooper's in Llano, TX
- Jimmy Watson
Yo, Son! Real Talk! ... (coupled with excessive hand clapping and Brooklyn accent and followed by something semi-serious involving sh*t I ain't gonna do or that you *are* going to do)
- Rah-PM 2012
Hrm....I have weird sayings that I've collected from random characters, real and fictional, throughout my life. Some people must think I'm crazy.
- Rah-PM 2012
Well, I WAS gonna go see a movie and get something to eat, but then someone whose name rhymes with "my brother" took BOTH vehicles to God knows where. Crap.