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Joel Postman

Joel Postman

It says "Change Picture." I'd love to do that, but that's how I look.
Like Google Glass, but stealthier - - new Google Ass!
I had some Easter jokes from last year I was hoping to resurrect this year but I didn't have a chance.
RT @JULIO_CRS_: One more day till all those chocolate bunnies 🐰🍫 go on sale, gonna go to every @Walgreens in the area. 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
RT @JULIO_CRS_: Another day passes by & I still haven't used algebra.
Kraft is recalling 96,000 Oscar Mayer wieners! That's almost as many wieners as [insert name of promiscuous person] can recall!
I raced my friend to the conference on non-violence, but he beat me there.
Social networking is the best way for kids to get an early start on learning how to be assholes.
I wonder how many people die prematurely every year from the depression caused by receiving too many unsolicited AARP membership cards.
I bought some Dr. Who merch from Amazon and they now offer previous day delivery. #drwho
You know how picture frames come with pictures of good looking people in them? That should be an option on Facebook and Instagram, too.
I didn't like the last X Men movie.I thought it was going to be about the world of professional tic tac toe. #XMen #XmenDaysOfFuturePast
Found an inexpensive store for my teenager called "Cold Topic." Great deals on Nickelback t-shirts and cheap Croc knockoffs.
If a superstitious person takes a selfie, are they stealing their own soul or did they never have one?
I went to a seminar on "Earning a Six-Figure Income" and it really worked! My six figures are $1, 25 cents, 98 cents, $2, 39 cents and $1.50
I've been trying to make a deal with a company that makes flip-flops, but these guys are always vacillating.
Phyllis Schlafly says if women made as much money as men, they wouldn't find husbands. Could be the strongest case yet for wage equality.
Watch for the radical feminist X Men sequel, Y Men? in theaters soon. #XMen #XmenDaysOfFuturePast
I think it's fine for kids to have e-cigs at school as long as they're not in gang colors.
Can't see the #BloodMoonEclipse because of the fog, but I think I have a solution. https://twitter.com/jpostma...
RT @JULIO_CRS_: Google is great because you can ask something really obvious and nobody has to know.... 😳😳😁😁😂😂😂
RT @JULIO_CRS_: Only break 🍞bread with people you starved with.....👌👌👌
Following today's screening @USAirways will now offer inappropriate tweets in economy class on all domestic flights for just $8.99.
I'm on a tight budget, so I opted for Lycos Glass.
People tweeting that two of those killed at Kansas City Jewish center were Christian. Significance of this is what? #KansasCity
RT @TheBaxterBean: TERRORISM: 'White Patriot Party' & KKK Grand Dragon Arrested In #KansasCity Shooting Murders http://splcenter.org/blog... https://twitter.com/TheBaxt...
Adobe has a unique customer engagement strategy of having users update their software every day.
Among this year's top five rejected Internet memes: smellfies
You had me at "restraining order."
With Easter falling on 4/20, there will be more giant bunny sightings than usual.
RT @jogebauer: Social Media: The Virality of Stupidity https://exploreb2b.com/article... via @exploreb2b
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