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It's after 2AM and even though you are not Jenna Marbles you should still consider the chance that I like you.
Sure, I'll chat you up, but if you don't look, act, and think like Jenna Marbles chances are I'm not taking you home. Unless it's after 2:00
Chances are, if your phone is bedazzled, I don't take you very seriously.
Typical: At 9AM, accept 1PM meeting request. 9:10, shower and go to office. 4PM, accept Mon 9AM reschedule request. Friday ruined.
Magnificent. “@torrami: How to eat a mini cupcake: 1. Get cupcake 2. Cut in half 3. Make sandwich 4. Stuff face http://t.co/XZRcn5dy”
RT @torrami: How to eat a mini cupcake: 1. Get mini cupcake 2. Cut mini cupcake in half 3. Make cupcake sandwich 4. Stuff face http://twitter.com/torrami...
Alright, alright, to give the stalkers a fighting chance, you can find me at the Sweetwater Sweet 16 party on Sunday between 2PM - 6PM.
“@Baseclogger: One of my friends just misspelled genius. I obviously need new friends.” Or at least ones who believe in spell-check.
No, thank you. I would not like for you to send something to me at my office for Valentine's Day. Didn't you notice I don't take your calls?
Oh, so it's $60 for a dozen roses because it comes in a vase. Seems legit.
All I can say is, whoever they are, they better not harm a single red hair on her beautiful head. #saveAlexis
Oh Otis, say it isnt so. my autographed baseball doesnt mean as much now. "Otis Nixon accused of prison scam." http://m.yahoo.com/w...
I know I've said it before, but Dropbox is still my favorite free way to automatically sync files between my computers. https://www.dropbox.com/referra...
I've heard you pay a hooker to leave, so what do you do with a normal chick? Get them coffee, bagel and a cheese Danish then kick 'em out.
There is a stark difference between "devil may care" and couldn't care less. Know the difference.
Add one tunnel to my travel day. #QueensMidtownTunnel
Grand Central Station @ One Grand Central Place http://instagram.com/p...
Just landed at LGA, on a bus to Grand Central, I'll take a cab from there to the hotel. Let's see if I can work in a ride on a boat & train.
#NowPlaying Lights by Grasscut on #Spotify. Love this song, even if it's in a KMart commercial. http://open.spotify.com/track...
I'm going to Dethklok at Tabernacle in Atlanta, GA - Dec 8 http://www.bandsintown.com/event...
If you want "Free ESPN Stuff" do you need to spell Kentucky wrong? @ The Georgia Dome http://instagram.com/p...
The Prometheus story is keeping me from turning it off in a panic, but my irrational fear of snakes is exacerbating my anxiety.
Just dropped Prometheus into the BluRay, nervous with the excitement of watching an Alien prequel, and anxious that I'm alone in the dark.
She says with a #BoSox cap on. Pfft. “@FalconsRayven: RT @Alexbaylor: "This is how champions are born." #uga #yankees http://t.co/5UsolLlc”
Waiting for opening bands to struggle through their sets so that the Mighty Mighty Bosstones can take the stage at Masquerade.
When I wish for those affected by Hurricane Sandy to "stay dry" I'm certainly not hoping that they stay sober. On the contrary, get loaded.
The fact that Hurricane Sandy is not here in the ATL means that I am meant to be here at BounceU for a kid b-day party and God hates me.
Lemonheads are playing tomorrow night at the Variety Playhouse. I'm totally in the weeds at work though. Must... Resist... #EasilyInfluenced
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