"I looked at the calendar yesterday, and I couldn't believe my eyes—9/11 is almost here!" a rosy-cheeked Cheney said upon returning to the White House Sunday with two giant bags overflowing with gift-wrapped boxes and big red bows. "It's the most wonderful time of the year." While Cheney is known by many to be cold and taciturn for the other 11 months of the year, those close to the vice president say there is something about the 9/11 season that puts a smile on his face and a spring in his step. Each Sept. 11 morning since 2001, Cheney has come to work donning a fireman costume and handed out small, thoughtful gifts to all White House staffers. In addition, at his home on 9/11 Eve, Cheney lays out large piles of presents for his children and grandchildren underneath the colorfully lit, six-foot-tall 9/11 towers that he sets up by the fireplace." - Paul Buchheit from Bookmarklet

"No, 9/11 is about the warm feeling you get when you help an elderly woman cross the street and then whisper to her that the terrorists can strike at any moment" - what kind of a pov is this ? - Krishna Gade

I think I got it, but anyway: wat? - Rodrigo Jaroszewski

"Although Cheney himself has never received any Sept. 11 gifts, with the exception of a pair of silk pajamas from his wife and a second term in office, he insisted that he gets more joy from giving than receiving." - Roberto Bonini

For those who don't know, The Onion is humor. - Paul Buchheit

That is brilliant! - Brad Nickel

lol@Paul's last comment. Occasionally I almost forget, it's all so well produced. Heh, in some cases, Onion news items do get eerily close to the truth though. - Slappy Line

not just humor but satire. Biting, evil, but oh so funny satire. - Sujal Shah