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"He brought ketchup to a hot dog fight!" - @_chrisgarcia , discussing the riot at the Magic Mike premiere in SF (cc: @MrEmilyHeller)
RT @nodshot: I've started freelance writing for @KQEDarts and here's my first piece, an exit interview with SF comedian @LLCoolS
RT @boarsgoreswords: The Lion and The Roses? More like Christmas in April, @LLCoolS joins us in our re-cap of @GameOfThrones 4x02, get it!
"Dick Cheney, dude? Dick Cheney: totally pro-lesbian. And, dude, you gotta give him that." - Tech bro addressing a human woman.
Not gonna lie, I might be getting kicked out of this bar #Brogate2014
Further update: 4 shots of "top shelf tequila. ANEJO please": one-dollar tip. This guy I yelled at.
Bro's now sitting on the barstool & it's way too tall for his table, so it's awkward when he reaches for his phone roughly every 40 seconds
Full disclosure: I'm drinking what is basically a pint glass full of tequila w/ a salted rim - but I was dead sober when #Brogate2014 began.
Update! 3 new bros who pronounced "drink" as "drank" are upset that the bar is cash-only. They ordered three beers & tipped a single dollar.
Tech bro just accidentally swatted margarita out of his brofriend's hands at Latin American Club, then Instagrammed the spill. Mission 2014!
RT @Arr: A Story in Three Tweets:
Jon Miller pronounces every single syllable of Hector Sanchez's name differently than Mike Krukow
While cleaning my office, I found this post-it note from when I hosted a college comedy show on the…
RT @ClubChuckles: Adv. tix now on sale for the @LLCoolS & @ROBOTCAITLIN album recording shows @HemlockTavernSF on May 2nd. $5!!
RT @louiskatz: Breakfast At Tiffany's, But Just The Racist Part #RuinARomCom #RIPMickeyRooney @midnight
Tindergarten Cop #RuinARomCom @midnight
I was rooting for Kentucky but am happy anytime a guy named "Shabazz" wins a championship.
"Gotta make those. That's why they call them 'free.' Hey how come they never call traveling anymore?" - Dads
In a victory for dads everywhere, the national championship is going to be determined by which team shot free throws better.
He's wearing khakis and and a golf shirt and he does not understand the possession arrow but it is making him furious.
The most belligerent guy at this bar is drinking water and a coffee from an outside location and SCREAMING at these Kentucky teenagers
RT @ericdadourian: Shout out to an all black starting five that plays their home games at Adolph Rupp Arena going to the NCAA final.
Is this you @jamesfritzcomic ? RT @BAnderson_30: This guy sold his soul to the devil.”
RT @bubbaprog: Lexington Police scanner just featured a law enforcement officer repeatedly yelling "COUCH FIRE! COUCH FIRE!"
UConn vs. Kentucky: a true Cinderella matchup.
Tonight, I'm judging the Talk Show: The Game Show w/ @guybranum @calasich @Sam_Tallent, @OSheaComputer, @LLCoolS @NatashaMuse @thegissilent
The most shocking reveal in the new Captain America movie is what Garry Shandling's face looks like now.
#BringBackTheBestShow Because the situation on Muffler Row is getting worse with every passing day.
RT @ChrisThayerSays: *Varsity Blues voice* I don't want. My life.
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