Dateline Los Gatos. The Great Dry Needle Xmas Tree Catastrophe of 2014. Reports are coming in of Xmas trees losing their needles much earlier than usual. Who ruined Xmas? The drought. These same tree owners report trees are sucking up water at an alarming rate, but no matter how often the reservoir is filled, the needles fall, as do Xmas dreams.
When people post about the date containing numerical sequences or other oddities, I always want to point out that "14" is really "2014" which spoils it. In related news, I am a horrible pedant. #saturdayff